caughtinanetwork

[It should come as no surprise to anyone that people are switching bodies this week. Equius has been swapped before (for a tiny female fairy who could only communicate through the sound of bells, which had made life interesting), and he's been a yellowblood before too, so when he woke up in Sollux's body, it was no big thing. Sure, he's been rather irritated all week about how weak and pathetic this body is, but then he eventually realized something fascinating.]

[He could make all the improvement he's been wanting to do on Sollux's roboeyes without any bitching from the eye's owners.]

[And who wouldn't want to see that, right?]

[So he's got his SFC set up on the sink edge, broadcasting what he's doing. And what he's doing is taking apart one of Sollux's eyes. While it's still in his face.]

The eyes are a fascinating evolutionary development.

[Especially when all the wires and microchips involved in said eye are cascading down his cheek as he looks at himself in the mirror.]

I did the best I could recreating one, but there are still facets where I could improve.

[Using a tiny screwdriver, he pries a spring out of the eye, and it lets go with a soft sproooooing. The eye sparks a little, and he winces when a spark falls on his cheek.]

Does anyone else know anything about eyes and robots?

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[And Dirk, poor soul, listens to all of it.]

Yeah, that's really great. Now you might want to actually finish up so that you can make sure they all work.

[Poor soul nothing, this is quality bro-bonding robo talk right here!]

I'm almost done.

[With this eye, at least. A little more fiddling, some turning of screws, and Equius pops the plastic lens that covers the front of the eye into place (both eyes are blue this week, because fuck you, Sollux). He switches the eye back on, blinks a few times, and swivels it towards Dirk.]

Did you walk past some flowers on your way here?

[Dirk shrugs.]

Yeah, I guess. Why?

[Two blue eyes look almost as weird on Sollux as having the contents of his mechanical eyeball spilling down his face.]

[Equius grins, a look that seems very strange on Sollux's face.]

I can see the pollen on your pants leg.

[Meaning the ultraviolet vision works! He swivels back to the mirror to pop the plastic off the other eye.]

Why exactly do you want to be able to see that? Hell, why do you want him seeing that? Not that eagle vision isn't a cool as shit feature, I just get the impression it ain't one you want all the time.

He'll be able to turn it off.

[Mostly because he can. Equius can't think of any better reason to upgrade, really.]

And will he know how?

[He's no doubt Sollux has responded to the post by now, but like hell he'll bother checking in the middle of a conversation.]

I'll put it in the instruction manual.

[Eye roll at Dirk, the effect somewhat ruined by the monochrome eyes.]

Of course I'll tell him how! He wouldn't leave me alone until I did, anyway.

[Completely ruined by the eyes, but he can sense it anyway.]

You'd deserve it, too.

[You hurt him, Dirk. He thought you, of all people, would understand why this is the coolest thing ever.]

You know, it's not like I'm being a jerk here or anything. I'm improving something that increases Sollux's quality of life, under my own volition, for no other reason than to make his life better. Everyone acts like I'm gutting his face or something.

Probably 'cause it seriously looks like you are.

[Dirk shrugs.]

It's like- Okay, so there's this guy I know around here. [The person whose body he's in currently, actually, but he's not about to say so because he promised to keep quiet about it.] He's got a few robotic limbs and shit, right? Almost more metal than skin. The tech's all ancient, but when I offered to upgrade it, he refused. Didn't want something that worked better as long as what he had worked.

That's ridiculous. Who wouldn't want an upgrade?

[Equius can't fathom it! Especially since RoboEquius is always hassling him for improvements and tweaks, sometimes even going so far as to try and make changes on himself.]

Someone who doesn't want one. I think his reasoning is shit, but doesn't mean I'm going to stealth modify it just because I can't change his mind.

Sollux has liked every mod I've given him in the past. [Once Equius told him how to work it, but let's leave that part out.] And he'll like this one, once he gets used to it. Besides, it's not like I'm changing anything that wasn't robotic already. I wouldn't cut off his arm just to graft a new one on.

Ain't saying that either of us would. Just saying that not everyone'd like it if shit got changed up.

People are weird, Dirk.

Gold star, you're keeping up with the class. Hell yeah they're weird.

[He pats Equius on the shoulder- gently, considering he's doing it with a metal hand and in Sollux's body Equius isn't protected by that maniac strength of his.]

[Equius starts a little when Dirk pats him; it doesn't hurt, but he can feel more in this weak, sickly little body than he can in his own, and the force of it takes him by surprise. He shoots a quick, half smile at Dirk before turning back to the mirror.]

Do you want to see the inside of one of these eyes?

[Dirk pauses for a moment in thinking of his answer. He considers Equius's face. Considers the body he's in. Finally, he nods. Weird as it is, robotic eyes are still fascinating as hell.]

Sure. Let's see what you've done, so I can correct it and keep you from getting a swelled head. Wouldn't want the eyes to stop fitting properly.

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[Action] please have him had walked past some flowers on the way there

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[Action] thanks!

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