caughtinanetwork

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((ooc: please feel free to opt out of his horrible writing quirk with a note in the reply/subject line, I have no problem with just using regular yellow courier and dropping the numbers/capitals. I'm afraid he still can't spell though.))

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[Did someone say teach Mituna things? Never fear, Bro Strider is here!]

oh yeah? good for you. knowing how to swim is pretty damn helpful in a place like this.

i can teach you a thing or two if you want. im no certified lifeguard but ive got the basics down. keep you from sinking like a fucking block of cement and shit.

WH477H 4 L1F3GAURD

lifeguards wear hot bathing suits and just kinda stand around. its their job to look pretty and shit. sometimes they blow a hella annoying whistle. just to get on peoples nerves i guess. stupid sexy lifeguards.

oh and sometimes. on really rare occasions. when its a full moon on the third day of the third month or some shit like that. theyll go into the water and save someone from drowning.

W0W
4R3 7Y3Y M4G1C

possibly.

itd explain a whole damn lot.

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I CAN TEACH YOU! I LEARNED FROM DUALSCAR HIMSELF!

[Who... accidentally drowned him once, but let's not talk about that.]

WH07H 7H47

[Mituna, no, you actually met him-- oh never mind.]

[Sufferer switches to video, smiling gently into the screen.]

It's me, Mituna. Sufferer, remember?

[The yellowblood blinks, giving a little wave.]

Yeth I know who you are.

[The not!Kankri with the unpronounceable name.]

... Who'th Dualthcar.

Dualscar is my moirail.

[He remembers Mituna complaining about the seadweller troll from his world, Cronus, so he doesn't mention that Dualscar is an adult version of him.]

He's very good at swimming and he taught me how, and I can teach you, if you like.

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Oh! I can teach you! I'm part of a swimming club back home, I'm really good!

WH475 4 7HW1MM1NG CLU8
D037H 17 HUR7

No, silly! It's a group of people who do an activity together!

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That's just what they call groups like that in school.

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ShIt, YeAh, SwImMiNg iS SoMe rIgHtEoUs bItChTiTs tHiNg tO Be dOiNg hErE.
GeTtInG YoUr fLoAt oN AlL WiTh tHoSe fIsHy lIl mOtHeRfUcKeRs.
AiN'T BeInG NoThInG WhAt bE AnY SoRt lIkE ThAt, YoU KnOw?
ThAt's sOmE ReAl sPeCiAl sTuFf rIgHt tHeRe.

[Gamzee really digs swimming.]

WH47 D0 1 D00 1F 7H0M37H1NG TR317H5 700 347 M3

WhAt iF YoU BrInG SoMe gRuB On wItH YoU?
ThEn iF SoMe mOtHeRfUcKeR GeT ThE WiCkEd hUnGeR On fOr yOu, YoU JuSt uP AnD GiVe hIm tHaT InStEaD.
ShIt, BrInG SoMe pIe.
EvErYbOdY DiGs pIe.