caughtinanetwork | 16th ♒ Voice

Alright, so I figured it only right I let all a Watheon know I'm dyin'. I'm a downright mess right now, miserable, and itchy and I think I'we caught some terrible, horrible disease and I'm gonna be a goner before too long.

[Have an aggravated groan and what might sound like some scratching?]

Auuugh! That's it, I know it, I'm fuckin' done for, this has gotta be some plague, it's bound to sweep through all a Watheon I'm sure a it. My death will be that of a martyr, I'm just doin' my ciwil duty a informin' the masses a this foul disease before it gets the rest a ya.

[He sounds so utterly dramatic, it's probably pretty hilarious really. Certainly making this hard to take seriously.]

I just wanted to say, Sol, I hate ya, there's not a fuckin' liwin', breathin' thing I despise more than your mustardblooded face, and Fef, you're the best 'rail a guy could ask for. And Kar, I pity ya with the intensity a the sun. Our sun, not this weak ass fuckin' wannabe sun this planet's got.

[Have some more miserable little sounds.]

Alright, that's it, I'm just gonna lay here in my respiteblock and liwe out my final moments in solitude.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Guess who's jumping in to chitter another response?]

-What invasive parasite crawled up your ass and died?-

-His dramatics would be the first suggestion.-

-But that doesn't mean you tell him 'good' about it, shitweasel.-

-Are you certain of this?-

[A brief pause, and then he makes a low regretful chirrup.]

-Also I am sorry.-

-About what? That you're acting with the mental age equivalence of a troll fresh from the Trials who thinks he'd badass just because he didn't die? Take a guess. And don't even argue; you've got to be at least quadruple his age if not older.-

-And if you're going to be handing out apologies, try adding one for how you flat-out failed to get your shit together enough to tell me when it was safe for Eridan and I to go back to our hive. I had to hear from Gamzee, and even then that was from a passing comment he made to the Psiioniic. You made a post for when the Summoner was killed; try actually having the grown-assed responsibility to follow through and update everyone. Then maybe you won't have to be schoolfed by a not even seven-sweep-old.-

-Not the first portion of your many words. The second portion is a small part of it.-

[There's a pause on his end as he thinks it over.]

-Enlighten me.-

[A low regretful, appeasing sort of chirrup.]

-I did that which you had requested me to not do at the time of that broadcast.-

[By now Karkat's wondering why Darkleer sounds so stilted, but that question slips out of mind once he parses the words.]

-You did what?-

[The accent is a bit different as well, he might notice, a very small changes here and there. They spoke a bit differently back during his time, and it shows in his voice.]

-You requested in the semblance of an order that I not cull him. I did not remember this and did so anyway.-

[Karkat by all means intends to answer that with quite the tirade.]

[What comes out instead is something that sounds a lot like this, but very loud, and very angry.]

[It's okay, he understands it anyway.]

[Just gonna sit here and be an ill sad pony.]

[CHITTER CHITTER CHIRP SKREE why isn't Darkleer answering, he is calling him out on his shit here!]

[Karkat he is waiting for you to finish, he sincerely doubts he could hear a gunshot with how much he is on a chittering rampage. Besides it would be rude to interrupt!!!]

[Well that is fair. Karkat is pretty dang mad though, because this is what he told him specifically not to do, and is pretty important besides. Nearer the end words start coming through, though still in clicky Alternian.]

[Chirpy chirp chitter] -told you to- [chitter skree] -sopor- [long mess of clicky noises] -lacked half the mental facult- [chirp] -follow orders- [chitter chirp chiiiirp] -going to die and it- [chitter skree chitter]

-can't fucking trust you for anything!-

[....Is he done? Darkleer waits for a brief second to make sure before he offers some low, thick clicks of his own.]

-I know. I am well aware that an apology is not worth enough to fix my transgression however attempting to prove any worthiness on my part appears to be an event which has a low chance of succeeding considering you have never cared much for my individual person since the beginning.-

[A few last non-word noises interrupt him here and there, but it seems whatever glitch nabbed him there seems to be fading off, at least for now.]

-Are you kidding me? It's not even close to- [chirp chirp click.] -And what were you thinking failing to tell us? Do you think that would make me take it easier? Because guess what!- [Skree!]

-I told you to do one simple thing, one you should have ostensibly been able to carry out like a functional troll, but no. Does no one ever- [chirpy chirp chitter?] -I even told you that was your chance to win some respect from me, and what do you do but shit all over it.-

-You handle the fallout, and don't expect me to so much as bat a palpebral flap over you and your issues after this. If the Summoner's own empty-lobed plans get him killed again, weep to someone else. If the Grand Gutmaggot decides he wants to throw a club-smashing tantrum over what you did, he's your fucking responsibility. If you die, I don't- [chitter chirp chirp!] -I'm done!-

[Click.]

[He calls back, just briefly.]

-It has been handled. There will be no tantrums.-

[Quietly hangs up again...]

16th ♒ Voice

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