caughtinanetwork | (no subject)

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[Center of the screen is a gaudily wrapped sweet, bright and tempting - and then the mess of colours in the background comes into focus, the staticy crackling of countless wrappers transmitted across speakers as Nepeta very very slowly attempts to roll over from her spot on the top of her sweet-wrapper pile.

One blue-gloved hand gropes out in the air as she tries to capture that final elusive sweet - but then she groans and gives up, clutching at her tummy.]

Owww, it hurts...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

No, you just ate too much and your body can't handle it.

...you're in league with the sweets, aren't you? Oh noooo!

[She's definitely just playing now, obviously already feeling better. The tummy rubs are very effective.]

I'm doooomed!

[Just don't wiggle, Nepeta, or else he might drop you. Okay, not really.]

That's incorrect. I'm in league with the vegetables, I'm afraid.

[There's no wiggling here! Though he may feel her starting to purr as he continues rubbing her tummy.]

That's even worse!!!

[Gosh just what will he do with this purring kitten in his arms?]

I would say 'better'. They are after all good for you and goodness knows you could use more of them.

[Snuggle her and love her and keep on rubbing that overstuffed belly of hers!]

I eat purrenty of vegetables! [Tavros made her eat a whole leaf of lettuce two days ago! Surely that's enough for at least a week, right]

Oh really?

[Guess who disbelieves that statement.]

How many a day?

[Purrrr, purrrr, pu...rr?]

A day?

[...]

You eat wretchedly.

Pounce used to feed me meat every day and I was fine!!

[Siiiigh.]

You probably got the nutrients from the herbivores you ate that you would have normally gotten from vegetables...

Do you think so??

[Don't mind her, just burrowing further into his arms now.]

It is why such things as 'carnivores' exist, Nepeta.

[Okay, gosh, fine, adjusting his arms!]

Although it should be mentioned that even they still occasionally eat grass and such.

I ate grass once! ...it didn't taste very good.

[Yes, that's much comfier!]

Beasts are generally different from trolls, Nepeta. I could give you the proper vegetable and fruit based meals.

[Just curling up into a smaller ball of kitty and staring at him with wide eyes now.]

...They can be very good if you know how to prepare them right.

[Which most trolls don't because stupid carnivorous race that he's a part of...]

But I don't know how to cook very well.

[This exactly. She's probably even eaten meat raw at times.]

Well, Nepeta, we have nothing but time. You may as well take some to learn. It is a very useful skill.

[Particularly to highbloods. Letting slaves make your food is all well and fancy, but, really, why would you want their hands all over it? Darkleer never saw the point. He never saw the point of poison testers, either.]

Maybe Gamzee can teach me to bake cookies and cupcakes!

[She may be missing the point.]

[Do you see this, Nepeta? This is a disapproving face. Such a disapproving face.]

And...vegetable pies?

[Sigh.]

If you come to me at around noon, on most days, I make something quick and specific to my diet. I can show you how to make that sort of meal.