caughtinanetwork

[When the SFC turns on, it's pointed towards the ocean, and it stays there for a few moments, just recording the waves rolling in and out, the soft sounds of the water, the occasional cry of a seabird. Then someone clears their throat, and starts speaking quietly. Those who have heard him speak before will recognize Sufferer's voice.]

I've been thinking about time lately, and how its path is not linear and seems to follow no set pattern. Sometimes, when there's a moment you want to cling to with everything you have, it flickers past, here and then gone; and then when there's something you want to rush through, it lingers, and minutes become hours, and hours days, days weeks, and so on.

The only thing consistent about time is that it passes.

Until it doesn't.

[There's a sigh, and the SFC turns so it's pointing towards Sufferer's face. He looks tired, like he does most of the time now, the bags under his eyes staining his skin like bruises. The flesh on his face hangs off the bones, deep lines that were never there before framing either side of his mouth.]

[He still has the orange stitches on his cloak, though.]

I've died, twice. Once here, where I revived five days later, and once in my own world, where I woke up here. In one instance, the time between passed quickly, full of light and love and beauty, and in the other, it lasted for lifetimes, lifetimes in the darkness, in the spaces between the stars.

[He shrugs.]

So tell me, Vatheon... which one was the true death? Which one showed me the truth about time, and which was the lie?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Sufferer remembers when he could believe in something so whole-heartedly. He misses that time.]

And it's just that simple?

[If he misses it, he should go back to it!]

Sure. You just get your motherfuckin' figure out for all what does get a motherfucker's glad on the most and you put what faith you got in that. Why has it gotta bein' any motherfuckin' different like than that?

[It's not that easy, Gamzee.]

Because what made me the happiest turned out to be wrong in the end.

[Yes, it is! People just keep making it hard.]

So? What motherfucker went and all decided what like you can only get your motherfuckin' believe on at things sorted motherfuckin' truthful?

Because trolls suffered and died because of what I was teaching, and it was wrong.

[Damn you mutants and your inclination for dwelling and grouching.

This is giving him a bit of a pan-ache to be honest though. He isn't that good with words, and this is Signless, not Karkat. As similar as they are, they are still different and this dude is not his moirail who he has learned to jam with.]

I know... like, when peeps get harshed and hurt all cause of you, I know it does all seem like real easy to become a motherfucker what don't see the mirth none no fuckin' more like he ain't deserve to, but... that don't help any motherfucker none, does it? You getting all salty at yourself, blaming yourself on it... it don't be undoing what did transpire.

[At least now Gamzee knows exactly where Karkat gets it from!]

... no. It doesn't.

[Sufferer knows a little of Gamzee's history, and about what he'll do in the future, and he recognizes that this must be very hard for the young troll to talk about. The fact that he's trying speaks highly of his character.]

So you have to try and move on and make things right, don't you?

[Couldn't he only have inherited your reasonably good looks, nice butt, and adorable horns?

It speaks just as much about his intelligence that Gamzee is doing this in public where everybody could see rather than filter that shit, but it is what makes him loveable.]

Yeah. Make it up to the motherfuckers what you wronged.

[If only Sufferer knew anything about technology and could filter stuff himself. Oh, well. It's part of his charm too.]

I'm trying to set things right.

[Every technologically inclined troll must be embarrassed to know them. They probably both use troll-explorer too.]

I just... I ain't feel like you gotta up and fuckin' believe in some shit what does get your unhappiness on to see just to be makin' stuff right.

[What is this Troll Explorer of which you speak? Sufferer just clicks the blue button with the fancy E and it takes him to the Internet. He doesn't understand why this embarrasses Psii!]

Gamzee...

[Sufferer pauses here, and does have the presence of mind to put up a very shoddy, easily hacked filter.]

What would your Messiahs advise in a situation like this?

[Psii is a drama queen! Does signless also have as many cool search bars like Gamzee? He has like all of them.]

Uhhh.

[He thinks for a moment. He really is trying here! But this is not the type of conversation he normally has. But for a friend, he'll try.]

I think they'd all be fronting like... a motherfucker gotta face up at what judgement be on his husk after he does fuckin' kick it permanent-wise. But that judgement be theirs to motherfuckin' hand out, yeah? So until you be before your personal fuckin' riddle box, you ain't gotta get your worry on at that. Just gotta be the best motherfucker you think what you can all be, listen at your fuckin' friends cause they be the motherfuckers what be there for you and uh...

[what else, what else]

Slam a motherfuckin' Faygo!

[Sufferer breathes out, and his sigh turns into a quiet chuckle.]

Then perhaps we should share another Faygo sometime.

[He smiles.]

You know a motherfucker would always be fuckin' down with that. Any fuckin' time what you all want.

video;

video;

video;

video;

Re: video;

video;

video;

video;

video;

video;

video;

video;

video - filtered;

video - filtered;

video - filtered;