♎ | 001

[lawesome]

[through the magic of time shenanigans It has been several hours since Redglare's arrival. Hours she spent investigating, scourging the brochure from top to bottom for every fragment of information, and even checking up on as much of the network as she reasonably could. She's even created a folder of notes on her personal palmtop dedicated to this strange, underwater prison. She is, above all, a professional after all, and it wouldn't do for a member of Alternia's Cruellest Bar to simply run around like a beheaded cluckbeast.

For now, it is time to change the focus of her investigation. Certainly there is much more to be found from investigating the place itself, but it would be a mistake to ignore the people living in it. And Redglare does not make mistakes. She has questions to ask, answers to discovered, and a network to start up, regardless of how long or short her stay may end up being.

She opts for a friendly approach. Catch more flies with honey, after all.]



OH NO! >:[!!!
1 H4V3 F4LL3N 1NTO 4N UND3RW4T3R BUBBL3 4ND 1 C4N'T G3T OUT.
WH3R3 1S TH3 CL3V3R WH1T3 B4RKB34ST TO R3SCU3 M3?
4 BR4V3 KN1GHT TO WH1SK M3 TO S4F3TY SO 1 M4Y SWOON 4MOUNTS TH4T COULD ONLY B3 D3SCR1B3D 4S TRULY OUTR4G3OUS!

H4H4H4, HON3STLY, 1 KNOW 1 D3S3RV3 4 V4C4T1ON FOR MY S3RV1C3S TO TROLLK1ND FOR 4PPR3H3ND1NG TH4T SCOUNDR3L, BUT TH1S W4S NOT WH4T 1 W4S 3XP3CT1NG.
WOULD 4NYON3 B3 W1LL1NG TO H3LP 4 L4DY OUT 4ND 4NSW3R 4 F3W QU3ST1ONS?



Oh no! >:[!!!
I have fallen into an underwater bubble and i can't get out.
Where is the clever white barkbeast to rescue me?
A brave knight to whisk me to safety so i may swoon amounts that could only be described as truly outrageous!

Hahaha, honestly, i know i deserve a vacation for my services to trollkind for apprehending that scoundrel, but this was not what i was expecting.
Would anyone be willing to help a lady out and answer a few questions?

If you want to opt out of me using her text, just comment here.]

Comments

[sniffdeceit]

TH3R3 1S 4 V3RY D1ST1NCT D1FF3R3NC3 B3TW33N OUR QU1RKS
V3RY D1ST1NCT
HUG3!

[Apparently, Redglare uses periods.]

BUT 1 C4N FORG1V3 YOU TH1S ONC3, 4S YOUR B1-COLOR3D SH4DES M1GHT POP TH3 WORDS OUT SO F4R TH4T 1T'S 34SY TO M1SS

[thekidsare0kay]

keep dreaming.
but whatever, let'2 talk ab0ut 20mething el2e.
i didn't kn0w y0u were here!
fuck, i'm a c0mplete 2hit2tain 0n the underwear 0f 20ciety.
h0w l0ng have y0u been here?

[sniffdeceit]

TH4T'S B3C4US3 1 M4D3 NO FORM4L 4NNOUNC3M3NT OF MY 4RR1V4L
K33P1NG YOU 4LL ON YOUR TO3S! >:]
H3H3H3 DON'T WORRY
1 H4V3N'T B33N H3R3 TOO LONG

[thekidsare0kay]

well, n0w i d0n't feel 20 bad.
when did y0u c0me fr0m, then?

[sniffdeceit]

FROM TH3 FUTUR3!
WOOOOOOOOOO
PROB4BLY
1T'S B33N 4BOUT A SW33P ON TH3 M3T3OR
4R3 YOU GO1NG TO 4SK M3 FOR SPO1L3RS TOO?

[thekidsare0kay]

nah, i d0n't give a 2hit.
here'2 the thing.
if i ever leave here, i'll be unc0n2ci0u2, blind, and filled with 2hame at my 2pectacular recent failure.
i w0n't remember the 2p0iler2, anyway.
if i d0n't ever leave here, i can 2tay happy and never give a fuck ab0ut what d00m and failure wa2 2upp02ed t0 happen t0 me bey0nd what i've already witne22ed in my vi2i0n2.

[sniffdeceit]

1 W4S GO1NG TO S4Y SOM3TH1NG 4BOUT HOW TH4T'S TH3 B3ST W4Y TO H4NDL3 TH1S S1TU4T1ON, BUT 1T'S SUCH 4 D3PR3SS1NG 4NSW3R TH4T 1 DON'T TH1NK 1 W1LL

[thekidsare0kay]

man, even when i'm trying t0 be happy, i'm a fucking d0wner.
20rry ab0ut that, tz.

[sniffdeceit]

DON'T 4POLOG1Z3!
1F YOU W3R3 4NY D1FF3R3NT YOU WOULDN'T B3 TH3 SOLLUX W3 4LL KNOW
H3H3

[thekidsare0kay]

that'2 pretty much a taut0l0gy, y0u kn0w.
hehehe.

[sniffdeceit]

M4N, YOUR QU1RK H4S GON3 4LL WONKY
BUT 1 SORT OF M1SS3D YOUR ROTT3N L3MON T3XT

[thekidsare0kay]

0h yeah, 20rry.
i kinda gave up 0n the duality thing, and i l02t my li2p f0r a while, but then i g0t it back.
i've been 20rt 0f experimenting, like...trying t0 figure 0ut wh0 i am n0w?
i feel like a l0t'2 changed.
but i'm 0kay with the way my quirk i2 f0r n0w, th0ugh my teeth keep gr0wing back every time equius pull2 them.

[sniffdeceit]

OH MY GOD
WHY WOULD YOU 3V3N H4V3 H1M DO TH4T?
1'M SURPR1S3D H3 H4SN'T R1PP3D OUT H4LF YOUR SKULL
YOU DON'T N33D TO G3T R1D OF TH3 L1SP, 4NYW4Y
1T G1V3S YOU CH4R4CT3R!

[thekidsare0kay]

i have a l0t 0f character be2ide2 my li2p!
i AM a character.
and i've g0t, y0u kn0w, trait2.
2hut up.

l00k, he 0ffered and i gue22 i mi22 being able t0 2ay 2a22afra22 when i want t0.

[sniffdeceit]

H3H3H3
YOU'R3 4LW4YS SO CUT3 WH3N YOU'R3 TRY1NG TO 4CT OFF3ND3D
WH3N DO3S TH3 WORD S4SS4FR4SS 3V3N COM3 UP 1N C4SU4L CONV3RS4T1ON, 4NYW4Y?

[thekidsare0kay]

did y0u ju2t call me cute, tz?
be2till my beating bl00d pu2her.

i MAKE it c0me up.

[sniffdeceit]

YOUR CUT3N3SS 1S S1TU4T1ON4L >:]

4ND SOM3HOW TH4T DO3SN'T COM3 4S 4 SHOCK
HOW DO YOU 3V3N DO TH4T?
1S 1T L1K3 "H3Y K4RKAT 1 H34RD OF TH1S MOV13 YOU M1GHT L1K3 4ND BY TH3 W4Y DO YOU SM3LL S4SS4SFR4SS 1N H3R3?"

[thekidsare0kay]

and y0ur cutene22 radar i2 h00fbea2t2hit.

i d0n't kn0w, it ju2t happen2.
like the way y0u rand0mly find red thing2 t0 lick and be inappr0priate with.

wow wtf happened there

[sniffdeceit]

1 DON'T R4NDOMLY F1ND R3D TH1NGS!
R3D TH1NGS 4R3 4LL 4ROUND US, JUST W41T1NG TO B3 NOT1CED!
1T'S H4RD TO 4VO1D 1T, R34LLY
4ND WHY WOULD YOU W4NT TO?

[thekidsare0kay]

well, y0u kn0w i like red thing2, t00.
but i have 0nly licked them a little.
and y0u can't di2mi22 blue!

[sniffdeceit]

H3Y SOLLUX
WH4T 1F SOM3ON3 M4D3 YOU CHOOS3 B3TW33N R3D 4ND BLU3 ON P41N OF D34TH? >:]

[thekidsare0kay]

then i'd have t0 thr0w my2elf up0n their mercy!
2uch a cruel ch0ice i2 bey0nd my capabilitie2.

[sniffdeceit]

HOW T3RR1BL3!
YOUR GR34T3ST W34KN3SS
1'LL H4V3 TO DO MY B3ST NOT TO BE T3MPT3D TO US3 1T 4G41NST YOU

[thekidsare0kay]

it'2 truly my achille2 heel.