caughtinanetwork | cake 1. [text]

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cake 1. [text]

I seem to have gotten myself into quite a pickle.
Not only am I soaking wet, which is nearly ten times as worse when you have a long gown on, I am also freezing.
Can anyone tell me where in good heavens name I have ended up?
Direct me to some warmer clothing?

[Yeah, Jane looks like a drowned rat. This is not how she imagined she would be spending this day.]

(I seem to have gotten myself into quite a pickle.
Not only am I soaking wet, which is nearly ten times as worse when you have a long gown on, I am also freezing.
Can anyone tell me where in good heavens name I have ended up?
Direct me to some warmer clothing?)

ooc: Jane will be arriving a few hours after this post !

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KARKAT VANTAS.
YOUR DENIAL DOESN'T MAKE IT FALSE, EITHER, "JANEY".

[He doesn't know her actual name yet.]

"Kitten", you mean? Jane Crocker, not like you were actually curious. That's simply because it isn't true.

EAT A BULGE!
ROXY'S THE ONE WHO PICKED THAT STUPID NICKNAME AND SHE REFUSES TO CHANGE IT.
AND IF IT'S NOT TRUE, THEN HOW DID I FIGURE IT OUT WITHIN LESS THAN A HALF HOUR OF KNOWING YOU, HUH.

I don't know what a bulge is, and I have a string feeling that I don't want to ask. But no, I will not eat one. Kitten is a wonderful nickname for you, you're acting like a kitten who just got water dumped all over them.

You didn't figure out anything.

NO, YOU DO NOT WANT TO ASK.
ALSO FUCK YOU, I'M NOT ACTING LIKE A WET CAT
I'M ACTING LIKE A TROLL, YOU DUMBSHIT.
YOU KNOW, AS MY ACTUAL SPECIES, IF YOU HAVEN'T GATHERED THAT MUCH ALREADY.
SO LONG AS YOU CALL ME THAT I'M GOING TO CALL YOU PRINCESS
BECAUSE THAT'S SURE AS HELL WHAT YOU WERE ACTING LIKE.
AND BEFORE YOU CALL ME WRONG ON A TECHNICALITY, NO, I'M NOT BEING LITERAL.
EITHER WAY YOU ALREADY ADMITTED I WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU LIVING AN EASY, PAMPERED LIFE, SO DON'T TRY TO BACKPEDAL NOW.

You certainly are acting like a wet cat. I gathered that some time ago.

[She's never met one face to face though. That she can recall.]

I was not acting like a Princess.

NOW THAT YOU BRING IT UP, THE ACTUAL PRINCESS I KNOW HAS BEEN THROUGH A LOT WORSE THAN REGULAR ASSUMPTIONS.
BUT THAT STILL DOESN'T MAKE ME A WET CAT.
WHY DO YOU EVEN INSIST ON CALLING ME THAT
BECAUSE ME BEING RUDE AND TROLLING YOU IS NORMAL TO MY SPECIES
NOT ANYTHING ABOUT FELINES AND UNWELCOME WATER
AND IT'S NOT EVEN A FUNNY NICKNAME.
IT'S STUPID, AS ARE YOU, AND ROXY TOO FOR EVEN CAUSING THE SUBJECT TO COME UP.

You should stop denying what a pain in the tush you are.

[Y u p. That's really all Jane has to say on this matter. He is a wet cat. Feline + unwelcome water = Karkat.]

SINCE WHEN DID I DENY THAT?
I'M SAYING I'M NOT A WET CAT.
I FULLY ADMIT I'M AN ASSHOLE, WHICH IS THE ACTUAL POINT HERE.
YOU KNOW
TROLLING
BEING A DICK FOR FUN AND PROFIT.
ARE YOU THAT DUMB YOU DON'T RECOGNIZE THAT?

[They obviously do not understand one another. There is a huge language barrier here- somehow.]

By wet cat, I meant you were an unpleasant being. How did you not know that?

BECAUSE IT'S A SHITTY, INAPT INSULT IS WHY.
A WET CAT IS MOSTLY FREAKED OUT, MAD, AND WANTS TO STOP BEING WET
NOT SOMETHING THAT GOES AROUND PURPOSELY BEING A PAIN IN THE ASS BECAUSE IT'S IN ITS NATURE.

The wet cat also carries a demeanor that if it comes in contact with the water, it's going to be angry. You are the cat and I am the water. In a sense.

THAT WOULD EXPLAIN THE AWFUL FONT COLOR
IN A ROUNDABOUT NO IT ACTUALLY DOESN'T SENSE.

Perhaps I was not aiming to make sense. Did you ever think about that?

IN WHICH CASE YOUR CONTRIBUTION TO THE CONVERSATION WAS EVEN MORE USELESS THAN IT COULD HAVE BEEN.
CLAP CLAP, GOOD JOB, YOU SCREW UP.

[Karkat is not even going to be getting a text back. This is not worth her time or the effort. THEY CAN TRY AGAIN NEXT TIME.]

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