caughtinanetwork

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[For those familiar with Dirk, they might notice something unusual about him today- for all that he usually wears shirts decorated with hats, he hasn't ever been a fan of wearing them. Until now, apparently, considering he's wearing one right now. It goes a long way toward making him look like Bro Strider, which is impressive, since they already look like clones.

It doesn't seem like he's about to talk about that, though.]

I have to say, I'm impressed by the amount of whining we've gotten for a simple curse like this. Jesus shit, it's a minor one, calm your tits and deal.

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[...Oh no.

That moment when the rival you want to simultaneously drive to greater heights of development as well as smash his face into the nearest curb looks distressingly attractive in accordance to certain tastes of aesthetics.]

...

[It's not often that Kid flusters.]

Take that ridiculous thing off this very instant.

What ridiculous thing?

[Kid should probably be worried about the look on his face.]

You're gonna have to be more specific there. Or do you just want me to take it all off?

[Troll in the dungeon. Troll in the dungeon.]

[That appearance of complete relief might be a little disconcerting.]

Yes, exactly. Good aesthetics never suits you, you must remove it immediately.

[...NO. HE DOESN'T MEAN TAKE IT ALL OFF. OH GOD.]

Except--

[Ugh, that moment when the aforementioned obsession with good aesthetics smashes headlong with his unhealthy obsession with hating the Destroyer of Souls.]

--the overall effect is not unwelcome. So long as you shut up, the symmetrical qualities are quite agreeable.

[Kid, if you want him to realize that you mean that, then you'll have to say it.

At least it will mean he shows off his tattoo, which is asymmetrical.]

So you're saying I'm hot because I'm giving you a symmetry boner. And that offends you? Holy shit, can you be any more of a demanding douchebag. That is the most roundabout way of asking someone to strip I have ever heard.

[Kid's lip curls with a distaste he can't quite repress.]

I don't get boners.

[This is as close to an abject declaration of asexuality as Kid gets.]

And I'm not asking you to strip!

Then, as I said before, be more specific, trollbait. Tell me what exactly it is that you find so simultaneously appealing and disgusting. Confirm for everyone present your utter lack of taste.

You've finally found a way to tame that disheveled mop you call hair. It's not I who lacks good taste, and it's too bad your personality has only taken a turn for the worse even as your appearance has improved.

The only thing you're right about is the fact that my hat is awesome. Not my fault you can't appreciate a good look.

[He's just narrowing his eyes at Kid behind his shades, now.]

That's great, except I'm not acting any different.

[He means there's even more layers of terrible still lurking, waiting to be discovered?

~~Excellent.~~ No, that's awful. It'll take him an age just to find them all. And another just to begin fixing it.

~~He loves a good challen--~~ WILL YOU STOP.]

What makes you so certain your taste isn't questionable at best, and more honestly simply appalling? You're a poorly-socialized stray cowering behind tinted glass!

[Oh, Kid, now you're just being needlessly antagonistic, but Dirk did question his aesthetic taste.]

[This will be a critical hit to the self-esteem once the week is over. He will probably be completely paralyzed by how accurate it is, in fact. Of course Kid would hone in on all the things that he has insecurities about.

But right now, he couldn't care less. And he just smirks.]

Says the guy who can't appreciate anything but symmetry, because he needs to arrange the entire goddamn world to suit his image. If there's anyone in the world I wouldn't want to be, it's you.

[He had expected a reaction, but not the sort that implied he simply didn't care; there's... something wrong about that, but Kid didn't want to distract himself from the subject at hand by taking a hard look at where a person cannot lie: their soul. Rather, the grim reaper presses on, with the sort of contempt he reserves for Dirk and what he represents.]

You're wrong.

There is much more that I appreciate besides good aesthetics. [The profound connection he has found in Maka and Rin, his two Weapons, the friends that he has, both here and back home. But now it's his turn to smirk.] I even appreciate how much we've learned from each other.

But you... you've become more despicable than ever. Has being human finally become too much for you to handle, so you're going to just throw it away?

Don't worry. The perfect and just world that I will create has room in it even for cretins who have found caring too inconvenient for them.

[Another blow-to-be. Perhaps the situation would be better if Kid looked at his soul, perhaps it would be worse, but right now Kid is playing bingo with the things Dirk normally despises in himself.

Knowing that the one person he considers his rival can recognize them easily cannot go down well. But for now, he's going into a self-destructive spiral of a different sort. He keeps opening his mouth and letting words come out.]

You don't know humans very well. Not everything humans do involves getting feelings over everything, you know. Calling me a monster just because of a simple conversation? You need to get your priorities checked.

Your world. Thanks, but no thanks. I think I'll keep this one, rather than living somewhere that you can be a megalomaniac of a leader.

Just look at you! You've gone and started with yourself, you're a heartless fool, Dirk Strider! To hear you call yourself a monster comes as no surprise.

[Because he never said it, and only assumes that Dirk has come to such a conclusion because he thinks it, personally.

And that's a tendency Kid himself has. He's projecting, that tends to be a thing with the neurotic.]

...

What did you call me? A megalomaniac?

So when I use my brain and not my feelings, I'm heartless by your definition. I'll keep that in mind. You're the one who said I'd abandoned my humanity. Said with such a negative connotation, what else can I assume but that you're calling me less than human?

[Well, it's partially right. And that's what will make it worse, come Sunday.]

Yes, I did. Accurate, isn't it? It's like they crafted a word just for you.

[His first instinct is to track Dirk down and give him a ringing backhand for what amounts to a gross insult; he resists acting on it. Barely.]

Do you think being something other than human makes you something less? God or witch, human or demon, the form it takes doesn't matter, when it's the soul that makes all the difference!

I mean your soul has become weak. What happened to you?

[That instinct will need to be thoroughly restrained for the entire conversation.]

Really. If you're looking for an excuse to try and beat me again, you could just ask, you know. Nothing's happened to me or my soul.

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