Dark Link (
replicatedcourage) wrote in
caughtinanetwork2012-02-13 04:35 pm
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[Sola appears on the screen, face puffy and expression desolate. His eyes don't meet the camera as he speaks, low and halting.]
I just wanted to say, I'm really sorry for hurting anyone...
[He rubs his eyes with the back of his hand, sniffling a bit before continuing.]
You won't have to worry about me anymore. I-I won't bother anybody, so... just... forget me. It's better that way.
Zelda, especially, I-I'm sorry I'm not...
[He swallows hard, turning a little further away from the camera.]
I'm sorry I'm not him. I hope he finds you, and that you can be happy. I-I promise, he... he loves you very much.
[He sits there, back to the camera, for an interminable moment, sorrow plain in the hunch of his shoulders. With a small swallow, he turns off the feed.]
I just wanted to say, I'm really sorry for hurting anyone...
[He rubs his eyes with the back of his hand, sniffling a bit before continuing.]
You won't have to worry about me anymore. I-I won't bother anybody, so... just... forget me. It's better that way.
Zelda, especially, I-I'm sorry I'm not...
[He swallows hard, turning a little further away from the camera.]
I'm sorry I'm not him. I hope he finds you, and that you can be happy. I-I promise, he... he loves you very much.
[He sits there, back to the camera, for an interminable moment, sorrow plain in the hunch of his shoulders. With a small swallow, he turns off the feed.]
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But Sola... think about all the good things you've felt too. Remember in the park, when you first learned how to use your sylladex? And how happy you were, and how proud of you I was?
[He brushes some silvery hair off his friend's forehead.]
Or playing ball at the picnic? Living and existing means hurting sometimes, it's true, but it can also bring you so much joy and happiness that it makes the hurting worth it!
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Don't, you can't! Please don't let yourself fade away, don't go!
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but...
It's terrifying.
And Ion knows too, first hand, clinging to Sola's sleeve like a drowning man to a life raft. And Signless' arms around him are taut with worry, with fear. And suddenly Sola understands.
He can't fade away, he can't be someone else, even if he makes people sad... because they'd be sad if he was gone, too.
His voice comes out as a croaking whisper but he reaches for Ion, cradling him as Signless continues to cradle Sola.]
I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. I won't, I promise, don't cry...
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It's... it's alright. You don't have to apologize. But I'm glad... that you understand now. We might have been created as replacements, but people aren't something that can be replaced. That includes us.
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[He certainly doesn't want to vanish, not anymore, not if it will make them sad, but he does wish this pain in his chest would go away, that Zelda's face would stop haunting him.]
...why is it so hard? Living, I mean...
[He directs the question to Signless, craning his neck to see his mentor from the position he's in. He's clearly still distressed, though no longer a possible danger to himself. It's a quiet distress, a deep-seated weariness that's settled into Sola's core and doesn't seem to want to be banished at the moment.]
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Because sometimes, things have to hurt, so you can appreciate beauty when it comes all the more.
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You really are a sage, aren't you? It's good to meet you, Signless. I'm Ion.
[He turns back to Sola. Now that he's talking instead of crying, he'll need to soothe his throat.]
Do you want me to get you something to drink?
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[Sola still keeps some in his bottle in the sylladex, but he's also relatively diligent about bringing fresh milk home for his roommates as well and there should be some in the fridge.
The forlorn Hylian shifts a bit, maneuvering himself to fit better against Signless.] I'm really sorry I worried you, but I don't know what to do.
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[Signless doesn't really consider himself a sage, but if that's what Sola and Ion want to call him, he's not going to complain.]
[He shifts too, curling tighter around Sola.]
You have nothing to apologize for, my friend. You're still learning and growing, and sometimes that comes with a few little hiccups.
[Squeeze.]
Most of the time, actually.
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I can't just be friends, but she doesn't want me to love her and I can't stop...
[He blinks once, moving his head back to look at Signless and Ion.] Can I? Is there a spell or something?
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[Signless gently cups the side of Sola's face.]
It would be a false solution, and the pain wouldn't really go away. There is a cure, but you aren't going to like it when I tell you what it is.
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[Ion leans forward, far too intent on this for him to not have some sort of personal investment. If he could stop bothering Anise, he'd be really glad...]
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[Sola just looks so pathetically eager to know, to get rid of this horrible feeling of helplessness and roller coaster of emotion every single time he even thinks of Zelda. It hurts. It hurts and he wants it to stop. Right now.]
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Time. Only time.
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Here.
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Isn't there something faster?
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I'm sorry. I know that's not the answer either of you wants.
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[WHAT ARE YOU SAYING SIGNLESS IT'S NOT LIKE HE'S HEAD OVER HEELS FOR ANISE!]
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[Sola's tone is curt, almost accusatory. He's frustrated and has nowhere for that irritation to go other than into more disappointment and sadness and so he lashes out at Ion, though he's immediately sorry for it and decides to hide his shame at the bottom of the milk glass.]
heeee, that icon! XD
[Signless pets Sola's hair, hoping to soften the effect of the gentle rebuke.]
It's not anyone's fault. It's simply something that is, and it's something everyone deals with at some time or another. If you want to be a full, functioning person, you will have to learn how to deal with disappointment and the sadness that comes afterwards.
[He gives Sola a one-armed hug, and uses the other arm to gesture to Ion. You want one too, bro?]
But someday, you'll meet someone you'll love, who will love you back in the same way, and it will be the most beautiful, glorious thing you've ever felt, and you won't even remember this pain.
It's super cute, isn't it? Sola-kitty says HISSSS
It's okay. He's right, I did want to know.
eheh, thanks
If this is being a person, it's stupid.
[Not that he wants to disappear, he doesn't, but there has to be something in the middle. Sola sets the half-empty milk aside and curls up in Signless's lap, resembling a ruffled kitten.]
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Now, now... think about all the things that have made you happy since you've been here. Everything you've learned, everything you've experienced. You couldn't have done that if you weren't a person.
The good outweighs the bad in the long run. I promise.