caughtinanetwork | 034 ♋ [TEXT]

[FILTERED AWAY FROM YUNO GASAI]

I'M ALIVE AGAIN.
I'M SURE A NUMBER OF YOU HAVE ALREADY HEARD IN ONE FASHION OR ANOTHER, OR FIGURED IT OUT FROM THE STANDARD TIME IT TAKES A PERSON TO REVIVE AFTER DEATH
(FOR THE RECORD: FIVE DAYS)
BUT CONSIDER THIS AN OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT TO ALL WHO DO NOT YET KNOW.
MAY I ALSO STATE FOR THE RECORD
*ERIDAN DID NOT KILL ME.*
SO LAY THE FUCK OFF BECAUSE HE HAD NO PART IN IT BUT FINDING ME AND REMOVING THE WEAPON.
WHILE I WILL NOT CONDONE A SENSELESS MANHUNT FOR THE CULPRIT
I WILL INFORM YOU OF HER IDENTITY AND WARN YOU TO WATCH OUT FOR HER PARTICULAR BRAND OF BATSHIT.
SHE'S A HUMAN BY THE NAME OF YUNO
LIVES ON FLOOR 2, APARTMENT 5 OF THE LARMLINE COMPLEX
AND HAS LONG PINK HAIR AND PINK EYES.
DO NOT TRUST HER EVEN WITH A COFFEE MUG.
DO NOT TRUST ANY SWEET ACT SHE PUTS ON.
IN FACT, DON'T TRUST HER IN GENERAL.
ALSO MAY YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THIS IS NOT AN INVITATION TO ASK ME DUMB QUESTIONS.
I AM NOT GOING TO DISH OUT GORY ACCOUNTS OF HOW I DIED, BECAUSE REALLY, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.
I WILL HOWEVER REQUEST AN UPDATE ON ANYTHING IMPORTANT I MISSED OVER THE PAST WEEK
BEING AS I COULD NOT KEEP AN EYE ON YOU MORONS ON ACCOUNT OF BEING A CORPSE.

[END FILTER]

[FILTERED TO THE HANDMAID]

I'VE REALIZED SOMETHING FROM THIS.
THE ISSUE ISN'T SO MUCH THAT I WANT YOU TO TRAIN ME
IT'S THAT I NEED TO LEARN.

[END FILTER]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

GOOD IDEA, I'LL THROW ROCKS AT YOUR HOUSE WHEN GAMZEE'S OUT.

D --> What
D --> The two of you are moving into the neighborhood

D --> There go the property values

HIVES ARE FREE ANYWAY.
THERE GOES THE CRUX OF YOUR ARGUMENT.
WE ALREADY DID, SO TEN POINTS FOR YOUR STUNNING OBSERVATION SKILLS.
JUST DON'T GO SPREADING IT AROUND, ALRIGHT?
I'M SERIOUS ABOUT THAT AFTER WHAT HAPPENED.

D --> I have more important things to do than keep up to date on your comings and goings
D --> Tell Flotsam that if his revolting chocobo shows up in my backyard, I'm kicking it back to your place

D --> And do you think I'm stupid
D --> Of course I'm not going to tell anyone
D --> No one gets to hurt you e%cept me

YOU AND THE HANDMAID.
SHE'S TRAINING ME SO DON'T BE SURPRISED IF I HAVE BRUISES YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT WHEN WE SEE EACH OTHER.
BUT FINE, I'LL TELL HIM SO LONG AS YOU KEEP YOUR CHOCOBOS TO YOUR OWN YARD.

D --> Training, huh
D --> Might be a good idea
D --> Since you're so loathsome you attract black suitors like flies
D --> Black suitors who don't know when to quit
D --> Darkleer and I can take care of that for you

D --> <3<

BLACK SUITORS?
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
IF YOU MEAN THAT PSYCHOPATH SHE SURE AS FUCK WASN'T BLACK FOR ME.

D --> Ashen, then
D --> Whatever
D --> Either way, I won't accept what she did

SHE WASN'T ASHEN, SHE WASN'T ANYTHING BUT A COMPLETELY SHITHIVE MAGGOTS HUMAN WHO WANTED EITHER ME OR ERIDAN DEAD FOR DUMB REASONS.
BUT JUST
LISTEN, DON'T DO ANYTHING RASH.
I'M SURE AS FUCK NOT PLEASED BUT I DON'T WANT THINGS TO GET CARRIED AWAY INTO A CHAIN OF MURDERS
BECAUSE I DOUBT SHE WOULD JUST TAKE IT LYING DOWN IF SHE GOT KILLED.

Edited 2012-02-22 06:29 (UTC)

D --> Who said anything about killing
D --> There's all kinds of ways an Archeradicator can get even

AND DO YOU WANT TO BRING HER UP AGAINST YOU?
SHE BROKE INTO MY OLD HIVE AND WAITED FOR ONE OF US TO GET HOME.
SHE WOULD TRY TO KILL YOU OR DARKLEER OR GAMZEE EVEN IF HE WAS THERE
AND WHILE I'M NOT SAYING SHE WOULD TAKE ANY OF YOU DOWN EASY
SHIT COULD STILL VERY EASILY GET OUT OF HAND.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT DONE ABOUT THINGS YET, BUT I DON'T WANT YOU SCREWING SHIT UP WITH YOUR OWN OVEREAGER DRIVE FOR PAYBACK.

D --> All you have to do is say the word
D --> And we'll show her
D --> We'll make her pay
D --> We'll show her what happens when you fuck with someone who belongs to a highb100d

D --> Pardon the 100d language
D --> Although who am I kidding, I'm talking to you
D --> You probably like it

AND I HAVE YET TO SAY THE WORD IN ANY CAPACITY.
IF AND WHEN I DO, I WILL BE SURE TO INFORM YOU OF ANY PARTS IN WHICH YOU OR HIM SHOULD HAVE INVOLVEMENT.
I DON'T BELONG TO YOU EITHER, YOU FESTERING SORE.
IT'S A WONDER THEY DIDN'T MISTAKE YOU FOR THE CORPSE WITH HOW MUCH YOU RESEMBLE SOMETHING ROTTING.
YOUR MARKS ARE NOT OWNERSHIP BUT SIGN OF ASSOCIATION, PROOF OF HATRED THAT I ALLOW ON MY PERSON.

D --> You belong in my quadrants
D --> That's reason enough to take action

D --> But fine
D --> We'll refrain, for now
D --> And please
D --> Darkleer and Gamzee wouldn't have done that silly cleaning up thing with my body

THAT SILLY CLEANING UP THING AS YOU PUT IT IS WHY I DIDN'T REVIVE COVERED IN MY OWN DRIED BLOOD.
BUT THEN YOU WOULD PROBABLY GET OFF ON BEING COVERED IN THAT BLUE SCUM, WOULDN'T YOU?

D --> I wouldn't know
D --> I didn't wake up after I died

I MEANT
...
JUST FORGET IT.

[Click.]

[Calling back!]

D --> Oh, don't tell me you're going to get all cranked up over that again
D --> You'd think dying yourself would lend you some perspective

I AM NOT GETTING CRANKED UP OVER THAT.
MAYBE I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE RATHER THAN GETTING MORE MORBID THAN WE ARE ALREADY
YOU WEREN'T EXACTLY YOURSELF FOR A WHILE AFTER YOU DIED, WERE YOU.

[ . . . . ]

D --> You know what, that's fair
D --> Let me know when you're feeling up to it
D --> And I'll hate you with all the boiling rage and vile black loathing you deserve

AND ALL MY UNEXPRESSED LOATHING FOR YOU FROM THAT TIME FRAME WILL BE PACKED INTO THE BEST REMINDER I CAN MANAGE TO SHOW YOU WHAT A COMPLETE ABOMINATION YOU ARE.
NOW SCREW OFF.

[Click x2!]

[Call back x3!]

D --> <3<

AGGRAVATING SHITWAD.
<3<

[Hanging up again, gosh.]

034 ♋ [TEXT]

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