caughtinanetwork | video, filtered from the Grand Highblood

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video, filtered from the Grand Highblood

[The video feed clicks on, and whoever is holding the SFC is tall. The camera is pointed downwards, towards a very small, very feline little troll, who is crouched over something on the ground.]

What do you have there, Nepeta?

[That deeply amused, rumbling voice could only belong to one troll.]

I found Eridan! But he doesn’t want to get up!

[The camera gets readjusted, taking in more of the scene, and a very angry, very distressed, very fishy face comes into view.]

[The kitty troll noses at Eridan's side and then nudges him with her head until he rolls over, and again, and with a delighted giggle she pounces over to his other side to do it all over again. She’s in full-out playful kitty mode and it looks like she may have been at this for a while.]

Oh my fuckin' god, will the two a you leawe me the fuck alone! Nep! Nep fucking stop ROLLIN' ME like I'm your personal fuckin' cat toy! Goddamnit, I'm layin' here for a reason I mean fuck! What--What if you roll me offa somethin'! I could, fuckin' DIE or somethin'!

[A glance up towards the camera, his eyes growing wide with realization, not to mention dreaded embarrassment!]

Oh... FUCK YOU, EQ! Turn that shit OFF!

[He shifts, as if he's going to get up, but he doesn't. He merely resigns himself to his fate with a disdainful expression.]

Rude.

[OOC: answers could come from Equius, Nepeta, or Eridan... or all three!]

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APART FROM NOT BEING ABLE TO ACTUALLY TALK, WHICH SUCKS A WHOLE SHITTY RAINBOW OF ASSES, I AM GOING TO BE PERFECTLY FINE.
I CAN DEAL WITH THE SORE THROAT AND THE COUGHING WITHOUT YOU FUSSING.
AT LEAST I'M NOT STUCK ROLLING AROUND ON THE GROUND LIKE A DOOFUS.

:33 < im not fussing DDX
:33 < cant i even ask if youre okay :||
:33 < are you sure its a curse and not just a cold??
:33 < whatefur is wrong with eridan s33ms more like a curse than yours

THE HANDMAID'S SICK TOO AND I'VE SEEN OTHER PEOPLE COMPLAINING ON THE NETWORK
AND CONSIDERING THE TIME THIS STUFF STARTED TO SET IN, IT'S A CURSE.
IF ANYTHING THIS JUST PROVES THAT IDIOCY IS A DISEASE.

:33 < oh my paws and this is the worst time when were not even in our hives!!
:33 < do you want me to carry him to you?
:33 < i can purrobably do that

:33 < and befur you say it, its not fussing i just dont think its a good idea fur our leader to do anything that will make him any sicker

NO, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO CARRY HIM TO ME.
I AM GOING TO GO OUT THERE AND TELL HIM HOW DUMB HE'S BEING EVEN IF I HAVE TO DO IT THROUGH TEXT
AND THEN IF ANYONE'S CARRYING HIM ANYWHERE, IT WILL BE ME
BECAUSE A SORE THROAT AND LOST VOICE IS NOT GOING TO STOP THE REST OF ME.

:33 < okay okay
:33 < come ofur and shout at him since im sure itll make you f33l lots better
:33 < hes not going anywhere like this anyway

TYPE AT HIM ANGRILY, YOU MEAN.
I CAN'T EVEN SPEAK LIKE THIS.
BUT FINE, FINE, I'LL BE THERE.

[Click! And then he's on his way, off to find wherever they are.]

[Nepeta is going to tell him that using text has never stopped him from shouting before, but then he's hung up and left her to wait for him to get there.

She'll convince Equius that they've played long enough and he should get back to patrolling, and then she'll sit and wait with Eridan for their fearless leader to show up.]

[Well, at least she stopped rolling him and she made Equius go away, so he can't honestly complain too much... Except for the fact he's been rolled around in the sand for LONGER THAN HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN, but whatever. He offers Nepeta a curious look, if she's done using him for her own personal amusement, then why is she still here?]

Nep--why are you ewen still here? I thought you were done playin'.

[There they are! Lo and behold Eridan is indeed laid out in the sand, useless as a legless grub with about as much rolling. He strides on up, and though he tries to say something, really tries, all that comes out are some hoarse, raspy noises. So, irritably, he first motions at Eridan to stand, then fishes out his SFC.]

GET OFF YOUR ASS, ERIDAN, OR I WILL HAUL YOU UP BY THE CAPE.

[Message typed, he holds it out.]

I was! But Karkitty said he was coming and since you don't want to get up I wanted to wait to make sure you were safe until he got here.

[Yes, the explanation actually goes on while Karkat is gesturing and typing furiously, Nepeta watching him in bemusement from her spot on the ground.]

Oh! And he said he can't talk beclaws he's sick and he thinks it's a curse and that's purrobably why you're acting strange too.

[She nods a couple of times - there, see, Karkat? She's being helpful.]

[Do you see those raised eyebrows of concern as you rasp, Karkat? Those are at you. But when he sees that motion, and then the message, he huffs.]

I'm not mowin' Kar! I'm safe right fuckin' here--an' how's this a curse? Kar's sick, I'm bein' fuckin' LOGICAL, that's hardly a curse.

THANK YOU, NEPETA.

[That's held to her... and then Eridan speaks, and he's back to thumping the keys.]

YOU HAVE CAUGHT A CASE OF "STUPID AS FUCK".
YOU STAND UP AND WALK AROUND JUST FINE EVERY OTHER DAY OF THE YEAR.
WHAT ARE YOU EVEN GOING TO DO THERE
JUST LAY AROUND FOREVER?
WHAT ABOUT EATING
WHAT ABOUT MOVING AROUND
WHAT ABOUT DOING ANYTHING AT ALL BESIDES BEING A LAZY DIPSHIT?

You're welcome! [She finally gets to her feet and dusts herself off, though she doesn't mean to leave just yet. She knows Karkat can handle Eridan on his own but she'll stick around a little longer just in case.]

See, I told you he wasn't listening. I got him a snack earlier, but he can't just stay there furefur! He thinks he can, though.

I didn't catch "stupid as fuck", thanks! I'm merely prewentin' any needless fallin', alright? I don't expect someone who liwes so fuckin' precariously to understand! But yes, lay here forewer sounds good enough to me!

[Just gonna cross his arms over his chest and scowl.]

An' yeah, Nep got me some food earlier, see? This works out. I can just lay here, an' you can just bring me stuff. Problem fuckin' solwed.

Edited 2012-02-28 22:29 (UTC)

[Karkat rolls his eyes heavily at that.]

NEPETA, AS LEADER I HEREBY FORBID YOU FROM BRINGING THIS LAZY SACK OF SHIT ANYMORE FOOD.

[He doesn't even bother to hide that one from Eridan. He is however quick to type up something more directly aimed at him.]

FALLING IS NOT SOME TORTUROUS FATE TO BEFALL THE UNLUCKY AND BIPEDAL, ERIDAN.
YOU WILL LIVE IF YOU HAPPEN TO TIP OVER.
TRUST ME WHEN I SAY IT TAKES MORE THAN THAT.

[And yet he ducks his chin a bit, self-conscious still about the scar crossing his neck.]

Okay! [She's sounding a bit too happy to agree - because really, one snack doesn't mean she's his personal catering service, sheesh, Eridan.

And she's also going to tactfully pretend she didn't notice that moment of self-consciousness at all - it hasn't been all that long for her since she was bludgeoned to death either and she knows that reminders of it are hardly fun.]

Karkat, I really think we should get him somewhere with better shelter at least. A cave, purrhaps, or somewhere closer to our camp. It isn't all that safe out here if he's going to refuse to move!

I'm not a lazy sack a shit, fuck you! Just--look I know sometimes it takes more than a fall for shit to get... Well, terminal, but! Sometimes all it takes is a fall. And Nep? I'm not goin' into a cawe, those damn things... Cawe in sometimes an' hawe random drop offs and euugh, I am NOT bein' taken to no fuckin' cawe, alright? I'm fine right here, like I'we been sayin' this whole time.

[He notices that self-consciousness, but his fear right now is a bit too crippling for him to really take it entirely into consideration. Sorry Karkat, he pities you, but goddamnit getting up is too frightening.]

Edited 2012-02-28 23:04 (UTC)

NOT A CAVE, WE'LL TAKE HIM BACK TO WHERE WE'VE BEEN STAYING.
HELP ME CARRY HIM, WILL YOU?

[This he shows to Nepeta, this time being careful not to let Eridan get sight of the message. He's bound to freak out anyway, he's sure. But thereafter he captchalogues the SFC, and goes over to Eridan. There he drops down to his knees and without explanation, not that he can give one like this, goes to try and hook his arms under the seadweller's. If he'll let him. Either way, that leaves his feet to Nepeta.]

[Nepeta looks over the message and nods once, not saying anything so as not to let Eridan know what they're planning.

As soon as Karkat bends down to try and grab him under the arms she does the same for his legs, trying to grab hold of him around the ankles and bracing herself in case she gets kicked a few times.]

[The silence was a tad unnerving, almost gave the impression that these two were plotting something or other. He looks between them, Karkat showing Nepeta something, which confirms his conspiracy theory, but then Karkat moves, kneeling behind him and--Cue freak out.]

FUCK! Kar stop, KAR let me go what are you doin' FUCK NO. Stop I'm fine here fuck fuck fuck!!

[His hands instantly grab at Karkat's forearms, grasping rather tightly as he starts to flip his fucking shit. Because, next thing he knows, Nepeta is grabbing his feet--or rather, his ankles, locking them in place despite how much he's trying to kick and move his legs.]

OH MY FUCKIN' GOD! P-Put me the fuck down, right now! I could fall, what if I fall, Kar please, please fuckin' PLEASE, put me d-down. Holy shit, fuck fuck!!

[Yep, he sounds downright pathetic, shaky, whiny tone and everything. You guys are just so horrible weh.]

Edited 2012-03-03 15:59 (UTC)

[Of course Eridan has to flail like, if you'll excuse the cliché, a fish out of water. And Karkat? Bless his angry little heart, but he tries to yell at him. Keyword: tries. For all the wind he evacuates through the associated chitinous hole, and for all the angry shapes he forces his mouth into, the most that comes out is a lot of hoarse rasping, all while glaring down at the squirmy troll in his arms.]

[Maybe if he just... He grips tighter, trying hard to hold him still while also not digging the tips of Eridan's horns into his torso. And last, a beseeching look at Nepeta. He can't talk like this, nor even type something on his SFC.]

Eridan, stop it! Karkat's the last purrson who'd efur drop you, and I'm not going to either, we're just taking you somepurrlace safer and then you can lie down until this stupid curse is ofur, okay?? Look, we're even holding you furry furry close to the ground!

[Nepeta's hoping that this is more or less what Karkat had wanted her to tell him, and she intends to keep a firm hold on his legs once they start the trek back to their camp. She's fought prey much larger than him, it's not as hard as she's expected to maintain her grip.]

And if you keep acting like this he's going to keep on trying to yell at you and he'll hurt himself with it! [She doesn't know much about how the two of them are with each other and hasn't even tried prying, but she's hoping that Eridan's concern for his matesprit might just make this go a bit easier.]

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video, filtered from the Grand Highblood

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[TEXT, filtered] tag me back if you want but after that we should wait for Zorn, obviously

[TEXT, filtered] okay! Eridan->Karkat->Nepeta after this then

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