caughtinanetwork | Sermon Two

[Signless has chosen his location carefully; when he turns on the video function, there's a wall of water behind him, and a school of brightly colored tropical fish swimming past. He's very clearly in the bubble again.]

My friends, today I want to talk to you about fear.

[His voice is low and soothing, his story-telling voice.]

I have known great fear in my time. In my world, the color of my blood was a source of fear, something that drove me into hiding for a long time. Then, when I dreamed of the world that could be, rather than the world that was, I was afraid again... afraid that I would never see what I knew we were capable of come to pass. I was afraid to speak out, afraid to make a ripple in the still, stagnant waters of our society, and tried instead to live my meager little life underneath the notice of the highbloods.

But then I saw what my silence was doing, what those in similar positions were suffering, and I knew I could not stay silent. I could not sit idly by while our world rotted away from its very core, while its corruption bled away the talents and very lives of so many trolls who had done nothing beyond being hatched the wrong color. I could not wait for another to come along and demand change, or I would wait the rest of my life. I needed to cast aside my fear, to find a reserve of strength within me, and rise to what my world needed me to be.

[His voice falls, becoming hushed and soft, almost painfully honest, and he looks down, his cloak hiding his eyes.]

I was terrified. Casting off fear is one of the most difficult things I have ever done. Fear is something I knew, its cold comfort as familiar to me as my guardian's face. It would have been... easy to live my entire life in fear, I thought.

[He looks up then, and his eyes are burning, his voice strong once more.]

I thought that fear was a cloak to hide me, but it was a chain I wore around my neck. When the fear was gone, when I made the decision to cast it aside, I have never felt so free in my entire life. It was how I imagine it must feel to wake up one morning with wings, and look out the window into an endless sky. When the fear was gone, I could breathe a deep breath for the first time in my life, and look to the future not as an ominous, foreboding thing, but as a path bathed in light and redemption.

I am not afraid any longer, Vatheon. This is my home now, and it is worth fighting for. I will not be driven out of my home again. I will not let fear control me.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

ARE YOU GOING TO DENY THAT YOU WERE LISTENING NOW?

D --> ...
D --> I might

[The most mature troll, everyone.]

D --> Besides
D --> Just because one listens does not mean anything

OF COURSE NOT.

YOU KNOW, I WAS THINKING ABOUT YOU FOR PART OF THAT SPEECH.

D --> ...Very well
D --> What portion of it had you think of me?

WHERE I WAS TALKING ABOUT CASTING FEAR ASIDE AND RISING TO BE WHAT MY WORLD NEEDED ME TO BE.
IT SEEMS LIKE THAT'S BEEN WHAT YOU'VE BEEN DOING HERE.

D --> It seems like your sickness is causing you to be delusional

SO YOU'RE GOING TO ACCUSE MY ILLNESS OF MAKING YOU TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN?
KARKAT AND NEPETA CALL ME DAD NOW, DID YOU KNOW THAT?

D --> That has nothing to do with the topic at hand
D --> Leave them out of this
D --> And
D --> Really what does any of this have to do with anything?

I WAS JUST WONDERING IF YOU KNEW THE FEELING.
ALSO PROVING THAT YOU WERE LISTENING TO WHAT I SAID EARLIER, IF YOU'RE ABLE TO ARGUE AGAINST IT SO WELL.

D --> I have not the slightest what you are feeling
D --> So I doubt I could very well say at all

D --> We haven't even begun to argue about your initial subject matter
D --> The conversation was derailed entirely

I MEANT IF YOU KNEW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE WHEN ONE OR TWO OF THE CHILDREN TRUSTS YOU ENOUGH TO CALL YOU DAD.
I DON'T KNOW, I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT KNOW WHAT THAT'S LIKE.

AND OUR CONVERSATIONS TEND TO DO THAT, I'VE NOTICED.
IF YOU REALLY WANT TO GET RID OF ME IN A HURRY, I SUGGEST JUST BEING HONEST; WE COULD GET TO THE ROOT OF MATTERS MUCH FASTER.

[...You're a jerk, Signless.]

D --> Casting away fear so completely is a fool's move

[Yep, they're totally calling him Dad.]

OF COURSE IT WOULD BE FOOLISH TO LIVE WITHOUT IT ENTIRELY, OR TO NOT LISTEN WHEN IT RAISES ITS HEAD.
I'M SIMPLY SAYING THAT YOU CAN'T LET IT CONTROL YOU AND SHADOW ALL YOUR DECISIONS.

[He didn't say anything!]

D --> Then you need to rephrase your words.
D --> The children will get the wrong idea.

[He didn't have to!]

OH, I DON'T KNOW.
LOOK WHERE I'M TALKING TO NEPETA, UP ABOVE.
SHE HAD QUESTIONS, I ANSWERED THEM.
SEEMS LIKE THEY'RE ASKING ABOUT THE THINGS THAT CONFUSE THEM, AND THAT'S A WONDERFUL WAY TO LEARN.

D --> Hmph
D --> Also
D --> Was last time really necessary

LAST TIME?

D --> When messages are encrypted to be private
D --> Maybe they are that way
D --> For a REASON
D --> Instead of encouraging random passerby to hack in
D --> And say
D --> As if they were children watching far too many romantic films
D --> "I knew it"

D --> Just
D --> Really
D --> Really.

OH, THAT.
MY APOLOGIES.
PSII HACKED IT--I THINK HE HADN'T HEARD FROM YOU IN AWHILE AND WAS WORRIED--AND THEN COULDN'T DEAL WITH WHAT HE SAW.
BUT YOU'RE RIGHT, IT WASN'T MY PLACE TO INTERFERE, SO I'M SORRY.
JUST PLEASE DON'T GET ANGRY WITH PSII. HE MEANT YOU NO HARM, IT WAS ALL MY DOING TO GET INVOLVED.
I WON'T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN.

D --> I said nothing about being displeased at him
D --> I am annoyed
D --> More than annoyed
D --> that you int
D --> That your first reaction wasn't to turn the SFC off
D --> But to get in a jab and be a ridiculous meddler

THAT'S IN MY NATURE, I'M AFRAID.
I WAS JUST SO HAPPY TO SEE THAT YOU AND SUMMONER HAD FOUND EACH OTHER THAT I FORGOT MY MANNERS. AS I SAID, IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.

D --> Really

[Tis a disbeliever on your hands, Signless.]

REALLY!

D --> ...Stop meddling in other people's quadrants

SO YOU ADMIT YOU'RE IN A QUADRANT WITH HIM?

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