> Nepeta and Gamzee: Ship all the things

[bestestfurrend]

[When the recording starts the picture is moving along in a rather strange, jerky motion, up to a door that gets headbutted open by the feathery head that's holding the starfish in its mouth, revealing...

...what seems to be the low-lit interior of something more akin to a cave than a room, littered with messy piles of soft scraps and plushies and yarn and even the occasional teapot.

A monstrous shadow looms on the wall, a fearsome looking four-horned creature.]

You're the best, Gamzee! I'd nefur have been able to reach to use all that extra wall if you weren't here, nope nope nope!

[And with a squawk the chocobo drops the SFC, sending it cartwheeling until it points at the origins of that shadow, a messier-than-usual kitty troll perched on a clown troll's shoulders, various hues of paint staining her hands and clothes and even her cheeks, still dripping a bright red from an outstretched paintbrush that had been adding the finishing touches to a heart high up on:]



Oh, Pounce! Hi Pounce! I'm really glad that Gamzee brought you to visi...POUNCE WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?! OH NOOOOO...

[She attempts to leap at the wall to block it from view; this doesn't go well when instead it just makes both trolls topple over in a tangle of limbs.]

My wallllllll! [click!]


((ooc: image by our amazing Gamzee-mun!))

Comments

[aim_exorable]

[There is a high chance that just getting close to her will mean another scimitar at his throat, the shallow wound on his face being torn open further, more blood staining his skin and clothes.]

[Darkleer kneels down besides her anyway. He feels weighed down.]

I don't think you're a better person than you are.

[And before she can twist it-]

You are simply yourself.

welp this is the only crying icon i have

[o8liter8]

[ And that's just too much, and abruptly she feels exposed and raw in a way she hasn't in sweeps. There's too much going on and then Darkleer has to come in and be so infuriatingly himself.

She rests her small weight against the bulk of his body and abruptly starts to cry, in a manner almost as if she doesn't quite know how to do it anymore. ]

God, just- fuck all of this. All of it.

where she's macking on his boyfriend, SWEET /dying

[aim_exorable]

I know...

[Because he's hardly been able to refuse her anything, life debt or not, Darkleer lets her stay where she is. He adjusts, just like he always has, and wraps himself around her.]

I'm sorry.

SOMETIMES IN LIFE YOU MAKE HARD ICON DECISIONS OK

[o8liter8]

[ She lets out a choked, tiny whimper of a sob, and she slumps into him, helpless. ]

I don't...know what to do. I don't know, Chiron, I don't even know myself.

[aim_exorable]

You know yourself well enough. You just aren't who they remember you as, and that is of no fault of your own.

Just weather it out. That's all that can be done.

[o8liter8]

[ Mindfang curls her arms around him, crying cerulean blue tears into the armor at his chest. She doesn't say much else. She doesn't know where to even begin saying anything. She's never had or even thought about having a feelings jam in her life. ]

[aim_exorable]

[Well, neither has Darkleer, save perhaps just recently, and he's not even sure what to think about that. Besides, they're not moirails, or matesprits, or anything. He's not sure what he should do...]

I'm sorry.

[It's all he can think to say.]

[o8liter8]

Don't go.

[ The words are barely a squeak to get out, and it's not something she's ever said before. Not something she's ever admitted she could feel. Abruptly she feels weak and insecure all over again. ]

[aim_exorable]

[He doesn't mention that he told Vriska he would meet her in a few hours. Darkleer just nods.]

...I wanted to make you happy.

[o8liter8]

You make that sound so simple and easy.

[ It never is, for her. ]

[aim_exorable]

I thought it could be.

[A sigh that goes through her hair as he rests his head against hers.]

If I became a proper Archeradicator. I thought a great many things could be easier. For both of us.

[o8liter8]

I never thought it was anything we couldn't handle, before.

[aim_exorable]

We were children. We could handle living on the borders of society, but not the society itself.

[o8liter8]

I never really wanted to live in society anyway. You know my people skills.

[aim_exorable]

If you did, you wouldn't..

[He trails off with a sigh.]

[o8liter8]

I learned early on what society would do to a kid like me, okay? I had to survive. So I never belonged in it, never will, I'm not a good little tame blueblood like you. And they would have found out, and one way or another they would have taken me out of the picture. You know how the Archeradicators work.

[aim_exorable]

I am well aware, but there wasn't any alternative.

[He reaches up to rub his fingers against his eyelids wearily, only to pause awkwardly when they brush against his cut instead.]

I thought... I suppose it doesn't matter what I thought. You would have left anyway, wouldn't you?

[o8liter8]

I would have taken you with me, Chiron! We could go where we wanted - see the world - do anything we pleased...

We'd have lived free. That's all I wanted to do.

[aim_exorable]

[Freedom.]

[Even how he is technically free here in Vatheon, just actually thinking on the concept is.. so strange to him. Isn't it some ideal to have no chains attached, follow your own counsel, make your own rules? Yet everytime Darkleer thinks of it, something in him clenches and he feels sick. Best to throw himself into his work so that it is not dwelt on too deeply, so that it doesn't make him to useless.]

[If freedom is what so many have fought for, if that is what makes them happy... Then why doesn't it ignite something similar in him?]

...That would not have been for me.

[o8liter8]

[ And now she stiffens in his arms. ]

And that's what it comes down to, isn't it? If it came down to me or your Archeradicators, that's who you'd have chosen. They were more important to you. And eventually, if I hadn't left, they would have killed me for being who I am. Maybe they'd have even made you do it.

That's why I left. See? I'm right about everything. You can't trust anyone.

[aim_exorable]

It isn't that simple... Please. You know it isn't. Inansa... It isn't the Archeradicators, or Legislacerators, or any other group I could have joined. It's... Please. Just listen to me. You never care to, you no doubt never will, but...

I wanted to keep you safe. That is all.

[He manages to keep his voice steady as always. Isn't that what he's good at? Locking up his voice, his expression, his body language, everything, just to avoid being hurt further emotionally. But if Mindfang cared to look up, she would be able to see just how much those words hurt him. Maybe not as much as they would have when they were younger, but she is so striking a figure in his memories, so impossible to forget, she represents so much. To have her lash out like this when he already has experienced her risking everything to save him...]

I would not have raised a hand to you...

[Nor an arrow. That's why, when they finally saw him fit to be placed into a proper squadron and when tales of a determined little wreck of a pirate wench began to make their way to his ears, Darkleer did his best to avoid any port cities. Inland, that was easier. Less a chance of running into her. Less a chance of having to force himself to stay true to his duties.]

[o8liter8]

[ She does look up at the use of her name, and her eyes are still full of cerulean. ]

Keep me safe? As if I'm something to be kept. As if you were even around to protect me in the first place!

[ And then she shrinks away. ]

Fuck. Fuck, it always comes out wrong, I don't want it turning out like this-

[aim_exorable]

Quiet. Just... quiet.

[Awkward, as if he's still trying to work on how to touch others without killing them, he places his hand against her cheek, a handful of hair between their skin.]

Breathe.

[o8liter8]

[ She feels so helpless, crying like this, like a little grub all over again, back when she'd caught her leg in a cruel trap for animals and thought I'm going to die, either they're going to kill me or Mom will when I drag myself back

and then there had been this kid, not daring to touch her, but telling her to stay calm and breathe. He'd moved like she was something precious he was terrified of hurting, and he'd pried the trap open and pulverized it into little metal bits. And wonder of wonders, he had bandaged her up and carried her back, fed her anything he had until she could limp back home, and she'd left without a word once she could. She should have brought him with her, brought him back to Mom and her voracious appetite, but. A life for a life. She'd found something else to appease her lusus.

He's always been like that. Caring, even if he doesn't get anything for it. She can't stand it and she clings to it. Clings to him, snuffling and trying to breathe like they're three or four sweeps all over again. ]

[aim_exorable]

[And that... It's not familiar anymore. Not with how old he is, not with how things have changed between them, have changed him. But it is nostalgic, and he holds her carefully, letting her get it out.]

[If nothing else, he can weather it all. No matter what she does.]