Anthony J. Crowley (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
scaresplants) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
caughtinanetwork2012-01-11 01:07 pm
scaresplants) wrote in caughtinanetwork2012-01-11 01:07 pm
17: This is even better than reality TV.
[There's the sound of laughter. It's not exactly happy laughter, or the type of laughter that you have when somebody tells you a really funny story. In fact, it seems to have reached the point where it is exactly directed at everyone else.]
[The screen finally turns on, showing a particular demon grinning at the camera in the tidy location of a bar. Anthony J. Crowley is laughing at your misfortune, Vatheonites.]
Wow. Wow, this curse is priceless, isn't it? Just seeing all you people squirm when the truth is out...really, you make it easy to tell which confessions are the truth and which are not based on your reactions.
Ooh, and we've got some love confessions in there too! I have to say, watching all of these love triangles and squares and other polygonal figures is probably the best entertainment that I've had in the last several years.
[He snickers slightly, before taking a sip of wine.] And count my lucky stars, I honestly think the curse has passed over me. Haven't had the need to confess anything the last couple of days. Finally this place does something right.
[A pause as his smile widens.] So, don't be shy. Let all your secrets out to me. I'll have you know that I'm actually a pretty honest guy.
[...Wait a second. For a brief second, his smile falters. That wasn't exactly what he was meaning to say. But the smile is back as if nothing happened. Crowley is a pretty hard guy to read, after all.]
So, how about it?
[The screen finally turns on, showing a particular demon grinning at the camera in the tidy location of a bar. Anthony J. Crowley is laughing at your misfortune, Vatheonites.]
Wow. Wow, this curse is priceless, isn't it? Just seeing all you people squirm when the truth is out...really, you make it easy to tell which confessions are the truth and which are not based on your reactions.
Ooh, and we've got some love confessions in there too! I have to say, watching all of these love triangles and squares and other polygonal figures is probably the best entertainment that I've had in the last several years.
[He snickers slightly, before taking a sip of wine.] And count my lucky stars, I honestly think the curse has passed over me. Haven't had the need to confess anything the last couple of days. Finally this place does something right.
[A pause as his smile widens.] So, don't be shy. Let all your secrets out to me. I'll have you know that I'm actually a pretty honest guy.
[...Wait a second. For a brief second, his smile falters. That wasn't exactly what he was meaning to say. But the smile is back as if nothing happened. Crowley is a pretty hard guy to read, after all.]
So, how about it?
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That's one of the most impurrtant bits! Happy and sane, especially if they're high on the hemospectrum. Highbloods go crazy furry easily, you see. Uhmmm, sort of the opposite way you'd fall in pity? You hate someone furry furry much and want to fight with them all the time and purrhaps hurt them too but you won't let anyone else hurt them beclaws they're yours to hate the mostest!
Oh, that's easy, it's what I was just telling you about! A kismesis is someone you're in hate with! It doesn't have anything to do with tempting. Well, purrhaps with tempting someone to punch you in the face but it doesn't sound the same. It must be a furry weird business though. Do you like having to do thatt?
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[He frowns slightly.] So...kind of like a nemesis? Well, I don't think I'm a kismesis. I mean, I guess being somebody's nemesis would be nice towards my plans, but I'm more towards doing and inventing things that effect many people at once than going one on one with people.
Do I like tempting? Yeah, I do. You wouldn't believe the number of things that I have come up with in my spare time that do my job for me.
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Yes! Yes that's it purrcisely! A nemesis or arch rivals, just like that!
Hmm, okay, I understand what it is that you're doing but I still don't understand why!
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Arch rivals, huh? [He didn't have any arch rivals...at least, he think he doesn't. Hmmm]
Because, look. You know there's the potential for good and evil in everybody, right? It's my job to make people consider the evil side of things. Just imagine that I work for a big company that wants to make people sin. That sort of thing.
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Uh huh! Always purrlotting each other's downfall! Heehee.
Yes, yes, I know that. ...hmm, you'd have a furry easy job if you were a troll. Most of them are mean assholes (don't tell anyone I used that word) who'll cull you as soon as looking at you. They think being good or nice means being weak. But that's silly.
What's sin? It sounds like a human thing beclaws I'm not sure what it means...
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[A pause. Crowley's usual smile saddens somewhat as he glances away from the screen. Why is he talking about this with a young cat girl of a troll he doesn't even know? The confessions are one thing, but the whole thing doesn't make any sense overall. Maybe he's just feeling talkative- after all, Aziraphale isn't around to talk to.]
Honestly, sometimes people who do things in the name of good are just as powerful as the ones who do things in the name of evil. Neither side is weaker than the other. Believe me, I know.
Sin? It's basically when you do something really bad that you need to be forgiven for. Like lying, cheating, or generally making bad things happen.
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Yes! Yes, exactly! Like Signless! Even if he wouldn't believe he is, but just by talking to people and telling them to be nicer to each other he changed things fur so many trolls!
Buuut don't people lie and cheat all the time anyway? They shouldn't but they do but if they want to be furgiven for it they can just tell the purrson they lied to or cheated that they're sorry! Even if they did something really bad like cull someone, saying sorry can help. Like Gamzee saying he was very sorry that he killed me.
...uhm.
Anyway why do you make people sin when they do it on their own all the time?
no subject
...Ugh, he sounds like somebody I know really well. I shouldn't be too surprised, really. There are people like that everywhere.
Well, yes. But in my world, they take it more seriously. It's one thing to lie about losing someone's sock and quite another when you lie about where you hid the dead body you just took care of. And you got killed by this Gamzee? And you forgave him? Wow, that's a case of extreme forgiveness if I ever heard one.
...It's my job. It's what I do in life. My quota for work. Humans often do my work for me, but that doesn't mean I can just slack around.
no subject
There aren't many like that back home. Or weren't. Signless was special!
I suppaws it's beclaws humans are so much softer so they'd die more easily and have to be more careful with each other purrhaps? And...yes, I did, befur I got here. It was like I was telling you, he didn't have a moirail and he's an indigoblood so when he ended up sober he was terrifying. But he has a moirail now and he's doing better and he's a lot more like he used to be, beclaws he really was the furriendliest troll efur befur all of that happened, and I know he didn't want to hurt any of us really. If I stay mad at him beclaws of it it won't help anyone anyway, right? There'll just be more fighting and people getting angry and sad and I don't want that.
Hmm, it must be a strange job! But a job's a job afurter all. Do you like doing it?
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That, and killing people isn't exactly a very good thing to do in my world. They imprison those who kill others, or worse, kill them in turn. So a reformed murderer, huh? That doesn't sound too odd, I suppose...
Of course I like doing it. But I do it because I can't do anything else. You see, free will is something that hasn't exactly been introduced to my profession yet.
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Oh, they do that too back home, but you'd purrobably end up culled instead of imprisoned. The stronger and higher blooded you are the more you can get away with things. It's not furry fair but a lot of things aren't I suppaws. And anyway that's all gone now. Gamzee's trying to make sure it nefur happens again.
But that's stupid! Just do something else if you want to! Climb a tree! Or go hunting! Something fun!
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Well, that's how it is. The more power you have, the more you can influence others. I've seen it time and time again. And it never ends the way people want it to.
[A dry laugh.] Do something else, and they'll put my name down on the list of people they don't want existing anymore. That's how it is.
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Yes, I'm afuraid that's true. Alternia's gone now and I don't think that's how anyone wanted it to end.
[She shakes her head.] That's really mean, but it sounds like a lot of jobs back home too. But you're here now! They can't do anything to you fur it here!
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Wait, your planet's gone? How did it end? [This is interesting. He had prevented the Apocalypse in his own world, but he didn't know other worlds could end, too.]
How should I know? Believe me, I'm taking all the opportunity to do what I want, but I dabble in what I used to do a bit so if any of my colleagues comes around, they won't tear me to pieces for slacking.
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Yes, I'm afuraid so. There were lots of meteors and then Feferi's lusus released the Vast Glub and killed all the remaining trolls, except fur us beclaws we weren't in that universe any more.
But we wouldn't let them! It's not their world so they can't tell you what to do here!
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Vast Glub...? Meteors sound right on bat, though. We didn't have any meteors when the world ended, though. Must have not been in the schedule.
Uhuh. Try telling that to my colleagues, I'm sure they'll like the taste of cat troll for breakfast.
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Uh huh. It reached the furry ends of the universe and every troll that heard it ended up dead. ...yours did too? Oh no.
[Nepeta chuckles, showing off her razor-sharp pointed teeth.] I've met lots of things that thought I'd taste good fur breakfast. But they tasted even better.