caughtinanetwork | ♎

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♎ | 001

[~~through the magic of time shenanigans~~ It has been several hours since Redglare's arrival. Hours she spent investigating, scourging the brochure from top to bottom for every fragment of information, and even checking up on as much of the network as she reasonably could. She's even created a folder of notes on her personal palmtop dedicated to this strange, underwater prison. She is, above all, a professional after all, and it wouldn't do for a member of Alternia's Cruellest Bar to simply run around like a beheaded cluckbeast.

For now, it is time to change the focus of her investigation. Certainly there is much more to be found from investigating the place itself, but it would be a mistake to ignore the people living in it. And Redglare does not make mistakes. She has questions to ask, answers to discovered, and a network to start up, regardless of how long or short her stay may end up being.

She opts for a friendly approach. Catch more flies with honey, after all.]

OH NO! >:[!!!
1 H4V3 F4LL3N 1NTO 4N UND3RW4T3R BUBBL3 4ND 1 C4N'T G3T OUT.
WH3R3 1S TH3 CL3V3R WH1T3 B4RKB34ST TO R3SCU3 M3?
4 BR4V3 KN1GHT TO WH1SK M3 TO S4F3TY SO 1 M4Y SWOON 4MOUNTS TH4T COULD ONLY B3 D3SCR1B3D 4S TRULY OUTR4G3OUS!

H4H4H4, HON3STLY, 1 KNOW 1 D3S3RV3 4 V4C4T1ON FOR MY S3RV1C3S TO TROLLK1ND FOR 4PPR3H3ND1NG TH4T SCOUNDR3L, BUT TH1S W4S NOT WH4T 1 W4S 3XP3CT1NG.
WOULD 4NYON3 B3 W1LL1NG TO H3LP 4 L4DY OUT 4ND 4NSW3R 4 F3W QU3ST1ONS?

Oh no! >:[!!!
I have fallen into an underwater bubble and i can't get out.
Where is the clever white barkbeast to rescue me?
A brave knight to whisk me to safety so i may swoon amounts that could only be described as truly outrageous!

Hahaha, honestly, i know i deserve a vacation for my services to trollkind for apprehending that scoundrel, but this was not what i was expecting.
Would anyone be willing to help a lady out and answer a few questions?

If you want to opt out of me using her text, just comment here.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Deals with clowns lead to frowns! And torn out spines. Just something we used to say at the Academy.

[A legislacerator learns to work with clowns, exist with clowns, fight with clowns and talk with clowns. She even learns how to wash the stale smell of faygo and blood from her clothes. But above all she learns not to trust them. Ever.]

But all right. Lets assume he is dealt with for now, though I see you have about as much faith in that as I do... what about his descendant?

[Karkat raises an eyebrow. Nothing he knows about, not being a legislacerator by any account, but not all too surprising.]

Gamzee? Gamzee's fine. That's where we got the sopor idea: he's addicted to it, has been for ages, and it keeps him pretty calm and friendly. I'm not going to lie and pretend he's harmless in all circumstances, but I'm his moirail, and I keep that from happening. His sopor intake is by schedule, in specific amounts, to keep him lucid enough not to forget anything more than usual, but not so little as to risk withdrawal symptoms.

[She does look a little stunned at that particular revelation.]

Really? His moirail?

You don't stride up to a clown mid-rampage, pap his face, and shoosh him until he gives you a hug and not come out as his moirail. It's serendipity and I will not hear a word to the contrary.

[Look at that face. Don't even try to doubt it.]

[Okay. Now the stunned look turns into a stare. He strode up to a clown mid-rampage, petted his face and gave him a hug? That's... That's just...

Okay, she just has to laugh. Just look at that earnest firm face.]

Karkat, I think you just might be crazy. Possibly brilliant, but absolutely pan-rottingly crazy.

[Karkat shrugs, emphatically.]

Don't give a shit! It's what got me this far. There's not much of my life you could call not crazy. A mutant, have his own lusus, actually live, and think he can hide his blood? How crazy is that? A mutant who thinks he could make something of himself - and okay, so I did have some stupid ideas, but - one who didn't just want to be a leader, but became one, of a team comprised of trolls from across the entire hemospectrum, including the heiress herself, and succeeded. I led them through that game and fought tooth and nail to get whatever respect I did, and we won, in basic form. I mean shit got screwed up besides and I know I seriously dropped the ball more than once, but we got that much done with more success than any other session I've heard of.

Then when shit hit the fan on the meteor post-game, and people started murdering, yeah, I was scared shitless. Who wouldn't be? Especially when Gamzee joined in, who I never would have expected it from until he crashed hard into stone cold sobriety. I was terrified. I thought I was going to die, to say nothing of the teammates who did. It just kind of--clicked, suddenly, when the rest of us met up with him, and I did it, and we hugged, and that was that.

And on top of that--after everything--I've looked at murder, and what it's caused for me and my teammates and friends here and everything, and I've decided that killing is shit. Nine times out of ten it doesn't get anything good done, and even when it does, it's still hard.

I am the sorriest excuse for a troll you'll ever see, but this works for me, and I'm not changing.

Edited 2012-11-26 16:10 (UTC)

Good, you shouldn't. There is no one who can decide what we are but ourselves regardless of what others may think.

And you are correct - murder often does not do anything good. That is not to say death itself does not have its place. As a punishment, when it fits the crime, and when dealt out swiftly and respectfully by the cold hand of justice, death is very effective. But not as something decided upon by those with judgements too clouded by emotion or plain stupidity.

But all right. That accounts for the subjugglators. What about the seadwellers?

Don't think you can just use it like that here. I already told you that people come back five days later, and that kind of thinking just leads to bugfuck retarded revenge chains anyway.

[There is an audible tiredness in his voice there.]

Anyway, for seadwellers--

The Empress was only ever here once, not for long, and was gone before she could do much. Dualscar is surprisingly alright from what I've seen, once I gave him the chance, and the Signless is his moirail.

Eridan's not perfect, but he's a lot better than he was. You can thank me, by the way. I already mentioned this place has time shenanigans, right? The first time I showed up here, it was from an earlier part on the timeline, before that whole thing with Gamzee happened. What happened was that Eridan and I wound up moirails, and long story short, I eventually wound up taking it on myself to reform this casteist dickhole into someone halfway decent. It was hard, it was frustrating, and he is the most utterly stupid, stubborn, annoying jackass you can imagine when he wants to be. I have personally punched his face more than once to stop him from dumb stuff that would get him killed. And I actually managed to knock the sense into him, even if I was near to dumping him out of frustration more than once. Don't ever say I have no patience, because I have plenty and then some for the important things. Eventually I went back and that stuff happened with Gamzee, and some things here that I'm not going into, but he hasn't regressed back to how he was just because I'm not his moirail anymore.

In the interests of full disclosure and in case you ever get Feferi's opinion on it, yes, he's done some bad things. In order, he blinded my best friend, killed his matesprit, destroyed our hope against extinction, and killed my other best friend. But I say to you will full seriousness that, while he can't ever erase what he did, he has seriously reformed.

As for Feferi...

[Sigh.]

She's one of the people Eridan killed. Right now she is not of good opinion about that, but I at least argued her out of wanting to kill him for it. She's fine when she's being reasonable, but you can guess the kind of emotions affecting her presently. But on that same note, before she disappeared and came back without memories, she and Eridan hashed things out to the point of being moirails again. I mean, they used to be before the game, but Eridan was still a dickweed then and didn't serve the job well enough. Again, he's learned, which is why she gave him the second chance.

[He waves a hand.]

But that drama aside, she's basically the Empress's opposite. Energetic, loves fish puns more than anyone ever should, usually not interested in culling as murder. Ask her yourself if you want to hear about it.

Edited 2012-11-26 16:36 (UTC)

[Karkat certainly is capable of dumping information with the best of them. She's suddenly very glad for the little recorder, still committing their whole conversation to memory. This whole encounter is one she knows for sure she'll be listening back on at least once.]

I see.

[She doesn't have much more to say. That was such a heap of information, she'd rather examine it at first before commenting with any conclusions.

But really, with the matter of the seadwellers and the subjugglators discussed, it leaves the bluebloods. The Marquise she refrains from asking on. She already knows exactly her type. Darkleer, she refrains from asking about too. She has been in conversation with him already and besides, she knows his story. Which leaves--]

What about Darkleer's descendant? What can you tell me about him?

Is that it? Seriously?

[Not that her response about Gamzee was long, but it was still more than an "I see." But she did ask another question, and he's here to give info.]

Equius Zahhak, stinking, sweating, so strong he can hardly touch anything without breaking it, rageaholic, and only worth existing for a few reasons. He makes robots, and has made prosthetics in the past - Vriska had an arm from him before she went god tier, Tavros's legs are from him, and Sollux's eyes were also made by him. Also there was that time Aradia was a robot ghost, but that's not really important.

As far as things go, he's... on our side, I'd put it. He and Gamzee are matesprits for some unfathomable reason, and Nepeta's his moirail. Pretty effective at it, too. Altogether he's the better blueblood, but they're both pretty loathsome in their own ways.

[she gives a little nod, before she grins.]

Yes, I see! Were you expecting anything more?

So far your information has proven to be very dependable and if not entirely true, then as close to the truth as I can expect any one person's information to be. As I do not currently have any other information that goes against the things you've told me, it seems dumb to argue what you told me simply for the sake for arguing.

[He takes that in, and he thinks on it, and it's kind of hard to figure what he should make of it. Eventually he shrugs, kind of helplessly.]

Fair enough, I guess. It just seemed like a short answer.

Is that everything?

I think so. Unless you believe there is anyone lower on the spectrum that might be cause for concern.

[He pauses, running through the mental list...]

Not really. The only thing worth explaining, if just to give you the picture of why he acts like he does, is the Psiioniic. I'm going to guess you know who he is, if you're a follower and everything, but do you know what happened to him after the Signless and so on got captured?

[No reason to over-explain if she does.]

Yes. I am aware of his punishment.

[Her nose wrinkles a little.]

A travesty against justice. Not that the whole thing wasn't, but his punishment in particular did not fit the crime.

Yeah. He's a bit...

[He taps the side of his head.]

You don't go through that and come out of it without some problems. He's not someone you should worry about, mind - he's pretty gentle - he just doesn't follow the same kind of sense either of us do. He makes really good baklava, though.

Really good what?

[Baklava... lava. It has the word lava in it. Does that mean it is spicy?]

It's a dessert with honey, pastry, and nuts. He taught me to make it once.

[Not lava, baked goods.]

Make me some sometime.

[Not even spicy baked goods? >:C]

[Frown!]

Since when was I offering?

Come on, Karkat. Don't you wanna make a friend out of the coolest legislacerator our world has ever seen?

[Siiigh.]

I'll think about it. But if I do, it's my own decision, got it?

Haha, of course, of course.

Good.

[His expression softens again.]

But with all that done, I'm going to go back to my hive. Send me a message if you have more questions later and I'll answer them how I can, yeah?

All right.

[She checks her recording device, confirming that it was all on there, before it disappears into her sylladex again.

And then! Knowing it will probably make him flap all those limbs of his, she quickly rests one hand on his shoulder before he can get up, leaning in to smooch him on the cheek.]

Thank you, Karkat, you've been a great help.

[And quickly she retreats back before he can smack her across the snout.]

♎ | 001

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