caughtinanetwork | cake 1. [text]

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cake 1. [text]

I seem to have gotten myself into quite a pickle.
Not only am I soaking wet, which is nearly ten times as worse when you have a long gown on, I am also freezing.
Can anyone tell me where in good heavens name I have ended up?
Direct me to some warmer clothing?

[Yeah, Jane looks like a drowned rat. This is not how she imagined she would be spending this day.]

(I seem to have gotten myself into quite a pickle.
Not only am I soaking wet, which is nearly ten times as worse when you have a long gown on, I am also freezing.
Can anyone tell me where in good heavens name I have ended up?
Direct me to some warmer clothing?)

ooc: Jane will be arriving a few hours after this post !

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YOU ASKED WHAT RUMBLESPHERES WERE, WHICH WERE BROUGHT UP IN THE CONTEXT OF ME NOT HAVING THEM, SINCE YOU ASKED IF I WAS A GIRL.
I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR BREASTS.
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU WANT ME TO SHOW OFF, I'LL FUCKING SHOW OFF.
YOUR NEUROLOGICAL DEFICIENCY IS A LABYRINTH MADE OF A MOBIUS STRIP
EVERY ROUTE AND PATHWAY LEADS BACK IN ON ITSELF IN CYCLICAL, CEASELESS INFINITY
FOLDING BACK UNTIL IT MEETS ITS START AND STARTS ALL OVER AGAIN.
EVERY TURN IS A WRONG DIRECTION THAT LEADS THE SAME WAY STILL: BACK EVER AGAIN TO YOUR OWN UNFORTUNATE FACSIMILE OF A FUNCTIONAL MIND.
BUT THE LABYRINTH IS NOT BARE.
ON EVERY WALL AND PATH AND CEILING IS SCRAWLED THE EVIDENCE OF YOUR OWN APPARENT PAMPERED LIFE.
DEAR LITTLE PRINCESS HAD AN ASSUMPTION MADE ABOUT HER, OH NO!
PRECIOUS DEAR CAN'T HANDLE A LITTLE TROLLING.
GOD FORBID, A STRANGER IS BEING MEAN.
IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD AND THE CENTER IS YOU, ARROGANT AND BLIND TO HOW MANY UNIVERSES AND HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE BEEN THROUGH HELL BEYOND THE MINISCULE CONFINES OF YOUR STAGNANT IMAGINATION.
I LIVED ON A PLANET WHERE PEOPLE COULD AND DID DIE FOR MORE REASONS THAN YOU COULD COUNT.
I KNOW PEOPLE WHO HAVE DIED HORRIBLE, PAINFUL DEATHS
WHO HAVE BEEN THROUGH TORTURE
WHO HAVE HAD TO PUT UP WITH FREAKY HEAD VOICES TELLING THEM WHAT TO DO.
I'VE BEEN THROUGH THE END OF MY WORLD AND THEN SOME.
YOU, YOU WHINING LITTLE BRAT, ARE A CODDLED CHILD WHO'S LIVED HER LIFE INSIDE A PADDED BOX
AND I DOUBT EVEN ONE PERSON HAS SO MUCH AS SHAKEN IT TO SEE IF YOU RATTLE AROUND INSIDE.
METAPHOR OVER.
THIS PLACE IS FUCKING SOFT COMPARED TO SOME, BUT IF YOU SERIOUSLY CAN'T HANDLE ME THINKING YOU'RE ONE WAY OR ANOTHER WITHOUT ASKING, YOU AREN'T GOING TO MAKE IT
AND THAT'S WHY YOUR LIFE BEFORE HERE MATTERS, NOOKWIPE.

Edited 2012-11-24 19:56 (UTC)

[This is probably after Roxy intercepted. Jane is just looking at this wall of text though. She doesn't even know what to say to it. It's the longest insult she's ever heard in her life.

Sure her friends told her she had a stick up her hiney, or she was a tightass. But whoa. Was all the really necessary?]

You don't live what I did, and I didn't live what you did. So let's not even go there.

[Yep. Karkat's too stubborn to pay it any mind yet, though. And seriously, a troll's gotta troll.]

"BLAH BLAH YOU'RE RIGHT AND I DON'T WANT TO ADMIT IT", IN OTHER WORDS.

[Wow, she really doesn't like Karkat right now.]

I never said you weren't right.

SO THEN YOU'RE BEING A COWARD ABOUT THE SUBJECT DESPITE HOW TRUE IT IS.

I don't just discuss these things with people I've known for less than half an hour. I'm not an open book.

I'M STILL READING COWARD OUT OF IT
ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE THE ONE WHO MADE IT SO BLINDINGLY OBVIOUS IN THE FIRST PLACE.
NOT AN OPEN BOOK, MY ASS.

Read coward all you want. Fine, mystery troll. you're right, I'm wrong. But I'll never claim being an open book.

KARKAT VANTAS.
YOUR DENIAL DOESN'T MAKE IT FALSE, EITHER, "JANEY".

[He doesn't know her actual name yet.]

"Kitten", you mean? Jane Crocker, not like you were actually curious. That's simply because it isn't true.

EAT A BULGE!
ROXY'S THE ONE WHO PICKED THAT STUPID NICKNAME AND SHE REFUSES TO CHANGE IT.
AND IF IT'S NOT TRUE, THEN HOW DID I FIGURE IT OUT WITHIN LESS THAN A HALF HOUR OF KNOWING YOU, HUH.

I don't know what a bulge is, and I have a string feeling that I don't want to ask. But no, I will not eat one. Kitten is a wonderful nickname for you, you're acting like a kitten who just got water dumped all over them.

You didn't figure out anything.

NO, YOU DO NOT WANT TO ASK.
ALSO FUCK YOU, I'M NOT ACTING LIKE A WET CAT
I'M ACTING LIKE A TROLL, YOU DUMBSHIT.
YOU KNOW, AS MY ACTUAL SPECIES, IF YOU HAVEN'T GATHERED THAT MUCH ALREADY.
SO LONG AS YOU CALL ME THAT I'M GOING TO CALL YOU PRINCESS
BECAUSE THAT'S SURE AS HELL WHAT YOU WERE ACTING LIKE.
AND BEFORE YOU CALL ME WRONG ON A TECHNICALITY, NO, I'M NOT BEING LITERAL.
EITHER WAY YOU ALREADY ADMITTED I WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU LIVING AN EASY, PAMPERED LIFE, SO DON'T TRY TO BACKPEDAL NOW.

You certainly are acting like a wet cat. I gathered that some time ago.

[She's never met one face to face though. That she can recall.]

I was not acting like a Princess.

NOW THAT YOU BRING IT UP, THE ACTUAL PRINCESS I KNOW HAS BEEN THROUGH A LOT WORSE THAN REGULAR ASSUMPTIONS.
BUT THAT STILL DOESN'T MAKE ME A WET CAT.
WHY DO YOU EVEN INSIST ON CALLING ME THAT
BECAUSE ME BEING RUDE AND TROLLING YOU IS NORMAL TO MY SPECIES
NOT ANYTHING ABOUT FELINES AND UNWELCOME WATER
AND IT'S NOT EVEN A FUNNY NICKNAME.
IT'S STUPID, AS ARE YOU, AND ROXY TOO FOR EVEN CAUSING THE SUBJECT TO COME UP.

You should stop denying what a pain in the tush you are.

[Y u p. That's really all Jane has to say on this matter. He is a wet cat. Feline + unwelcome water = Karkat.]

SINCE WHEN DID I DENY THAT?
I'M SAYING I'M NOT A WET CAT.
I FULLY ADMIT I'M AN ASSHOLE, WHICH IS THE ACTUAL POINT HERE.
YOU KNOW
TROLLING
BEING A DICK FOR FUN AND PROFIT.
ARE YOU THAT DUMB YOU DON'T RECOGNIZE THAT?

[They obviously do not understand one another. There is a huge language barrier here- somehow.]

By wet cat, I meant you were an unpleasant being. How did you not know that?

BECAUSE IT'S A SHITTY, INAPT INSULT IS WHY.
A WET CAT IS MOSTLY FREAKED OUT, MAD, AND WANTS TO STOP BEING WET
NOT SOMETHING THAT GOES AROUND PURPOSELY BEING A PAIN IN THE ASS BECAUSE IT'S IN ITS NATURE.

The wet cat also carries a demeanor that if it comes in contact with the water, it's going to be angry. You are the cat and I am the water. In a sense.

THAT WOULD EXPLAIN THE AWFUL FONT COLOR
IN A ROUNDABOUT NO IT ACTUALLY DOESN'T SENSE.

Perhaps I was not aiming to make sense. Did you ever think about that?

IN WHICH CASE YOUR CONTRIBUTION TO THE CONVERSATION WAS EVEN MORE USELESS THAN IT COULD HAVE BEEN.
CLAP CLAP, GOOD JOB, YOU SCREW UP.

[Karkat is not even going to be getting a text back. This is not worth her time or the effort. THEY CAN TRY AGAIN NEXT TIME.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

cake 1. [text]

[TEXT] thank you very much! :3c also, do you have a plurk, and may I add you if so?

[TEXT] yes i do! its xxsugarcubes <:

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