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[For those familiar with Dirk, they might notice something unusual about him today- for all that he usually wears shirts decorated with hats, he hasn't ever been a fan of wearing them. Until now, apparently, considering he's wearing one right now. It goes a long way toward making him look like Bro Strider, which is impressive, since they already look like clones.

It doesn't seem like he's about to talk about that, though.]

I have to say, I'm impressed by the amount of whining we've gotten for a simple curse like this. Jesus shit, it's a minor one, calm your tits and deal.

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And exactly how bad can it be? Since you don't seem to have gotten the "mild end."

I wouldn't want to upset Rox by kickin' your ass, so I'll have to pass, for her sake.

[Oh so friendly!]

Okay... You're right I don't, but now I'm curious.

How does turning into a vampire and nearly killing your girlfriend sound?

i guess your right and its not so bad what happened to you for the curse? you got a hat? hats are cool!

Well, if you're so certain that'd be the outcome, I'd hate to disappoint you so.

[And they're doing everything they can to avoid a fight, too.]

Don't usually fit, is all.

What about you, fishface?

Of course I'm right.
Bingo.
Hats are fucking rad, is what.

[That appearance of complete relief might be a little disconcerting.]

Yes, exactly. Good aesthetics never suits you, you must remove it immediately.

[...NO. HE DOESN'T MEAN TAKE IT ALL OFF. OH GOD.]

Except--

[Ugh, that moment when the aforementioned obsession with good aesthetics smashes headlong with his unhealthy obsession with hating the Destroyer of Souls.]

--the overall effect is not unwelcome. So long as you shut up, the symmetrical qualities are quite agreeable.

[Rainbow Dash has a feeling that this is the curse's fault, but at the same time...if this is what Dirk really thinks, then holy Celestia is he going to get a kick to the butt at the end of this week.]

I can't use it on myself. I've tried it, and it only works on other objects.

[Not to mention it's really not the same.]

Turning into a vampire does not automatically lead to the near-death of one's girlfriend.
That second one sounds like it's all you.

["Things that should not be said" for five hundred.]

[Somehow the text seems amused.]

your curse is better than mine i got a stupid fairy and my voice went away

[She could always try for during the week, but it might not get much effect.]

Then stand on something and float that. Or I'll just give you my rocketboard, if you're going to whine about it so much.

The one wouldn't have happened without the other. My fault or otherwise. It's not like I knew how to be a vampire when I just magically woke up as one.

[Not dodging blame here. Just saying.]

[These two...]

So, you're fuckin' bald? Pfft!

[YEP HE'S JUST LAUGHING... OBNOXIOUSLY. Eridan stop that's ugly.]

AHAHAhaahahahaha...ahaha..haha, damn I haven't been able to have a good laugh like that in a while. Thanks for that. So, how about you take that hat off, I wanna see your shiny chrome-dome.

[Yep, he's ignoring Dirk's question on purpose.]

Edited 2013-04-10 02:15 (UTC)

[Kid, if you want him to realize that you mean that, then you'll have to say it.

At least it will mean he shows off his tattoo, which is asymmetrical.]

So you're saying I'm hot because I'm giving you a symmetry boner. And that offends you? Holy shit, can you be any more of a demanding douchebag. That is the most roundabout way of asking someone to strip I have ever heard.

Watch out, the fairy might explode.
Records say that they have a habit of doing that around here.

[Kid's lip curls with a distaste he can't quite repress.]

I don't get boners.

[This is as close to an abject declaration of asexuality as Kid gets.]

And I'm not asking you to strip!

I've never even heard of you.

i hope so shes really annoying

okay well maybe not explode but i do wish shed shut up

But the one also didn't happen solely because of the other.
Are there other vampires in Vatheon? I would guess yes.
Do they almost kill their significant others on a regular basis?
No.
Nor were there random near-deaths during the curse that turned everyone into different species, as far as I'm aware.

I couldn't agree more. [He had to deal with being a mage or something last month, along with stupid robes and no fighting skills. Everyone else is just weak.]

A hat? Is that seriously what you got out of this?

[Hey, Dirk. Guess who woke up Monday evening?]

At least I got something useful out of it: I can fly. Though I am pissed off that I still can't figure out what I lost in exchange for it.

[For once, Rin can... kind of sort of agree with this. Sort of. Even if he was one of the ones making a big deal at the start.]

Yeaaah I kinda... panicked over stupid shit. There've been way worse curses than this.

'course some people might actually be worse off than me? I'unno.

Fucking wrong.

[Yeah, lifting that hat. His hair's kind of flattened from wearing it, but he definitely still has it. Ha. In your face.]

I'm so sorry to disappoint.

Then you haven't been listening for the three months you've been here. Really, Davesprite, I'm impressed.

Shove her in a box or something, shit.

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