caughtinanetwork | [video] in before eeveelution jokes

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[video] in before eeveelution jokes

[It's late. Or too damn early. Somewhere in that ambiguous area, like 3:00 in the morning, just fine for certain parts of the alien population and a god-awful time for the rest. But here Kid is, addressing the network from the confines of a room in the island-side village.

One can just make out a few figures (Maka Albarn and Rin Okumura) behind him, sound asleep in their bed.]

I have a very important announcement to make, one that simply cannot wait until morning!

[The grim reaper, looking more lively than he has since... well, since the bubble cracked, stoops out of sight of the SFC, and reappears with an Umbreon in his arms. Beaming with the pride perhaps only a father might have for their child, he declares:]

This is Pip, and he's become even more beautiful than ever!

[It is indeed Pip, recently evolved, and he is still fat. He is also a she, but Kid never investigated that closely. Promptly forgetting about the SFC in his eagerness, Kid retreats with Pip in his arms to bend over Maka.]

Maka, Maka! Wake up! I don't want you to miss this!

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[Damn kids ruining his sleeping schedule.

He's squinting down at the screen, because he's not bothering to put his glasses on. He is pretty much just going to roll over and go back to sleep in a moment.

Also, guess who knows absolutely nothing about Pokemon and has no idea that they evolve.]

...you replaced Pip?

Impossible, Pip is irreplaceable.

[Oh, hold on. Does he think this is a different Pokemon entirely?]

This is Pip, consider the changed appearance a new phase of his development. Or rather, I should say 'her'.

We were wrong about Pip's gender, it seems.

[Well this s certainly new information to him.]

It looks like Pip is going through a goth stage. Did you let her roll around in some hair dye?

According to a Pokemon trainer, she's evolved into an Umbreon. Having this particular coloration is unique to her kind.

I assure you, she is not...

Goth.

Are you sure? Because she looks like she's ready to go to a night club, and it's certainly the right time of night for that.

[He wouldn't have continued if Kid hadn't sounded so disgusted when he said goth.]

[Of course! Goths are just trying too hard to be Death Children dialed up to 11.5. Poseurs!! ~~Death City represent.~~]Interesting that you seem to have such intimate knowledge of a subculture in shoddy imitation of trends originating from my honorable father's city.

I thought better of your taste.

Edited 2013-05-08 10:50 (UTC)

They exist in my world too, and we don't have your father's city there.

[They're just those weird creepy kids who are depressed all the time in his world.]

And I never went through that phase. I'm a teacher, and teachers do research into the trends their students follow.

[The best teachers found ways to relate with their students, so this makes sense.]

A shame. If he had, I imagine things would have been remarkably different.

[Kid, your dad doesn't magically make everything better, jsyk.]

So I gathered. Marie and I discussed it once.

[Yeahhhhhh he doesn't like the idea of a God being right there to talk with and see everything that goes on.]

Oh? I'm interested in hearing about her take on the matter.

[It's not really everyday that you get a teacher's opinion, as supplied to another peer; even if he's Lord Death's son, teachers still have a way of treating him like a child.

Okay, so he is a kid, but gosh he sure tries to be a perfect reaper!!!]

[He'll spare Kid his own opinion of Death (unless asked), since it's not a positive one, but he'll tell Kid what Marie said.]

She made him sound like a pretty decent guy. She didn't have anything bad to say about him, at least.

My father?

Of course she didn't. Lord Death is a benevolent ruler and a wise headmaster.

[And he also locked his firstborn up in a bag of his own skin for centuries. Yet here he is, speaking with open adoration of the penultimate grim reaper.]

That's what she said about him too.

[Yeah no, Shiro is too much of a rebel to like having a god right there in the flesh.]

[He's a just god, who oversees the balance of good and evil itself in his world of Order. The subject of fear and respect, there are even factions that worship him in religious ritual, and his -- after a fashion -- are very large shoes to fill.

Kid isn't worthy to fill them, yet. There are many times when he wonders if he's even worth being his son at all, but he hasn't had one of those fits in a while!]

And what about you? You've never met, I understand, but you won't mind indulging my curiosity, would you?

[Yeah no Shiro is not okay with that at all. He'll scratch at the back of his head as he thinks up the least offensive answer he can give.]

Well, you gotta remember, your world and mine are very different, and I'm used to how things are in my world. And in my world, all of the all-powerful deities are pretty much in a competition of 'let's see who can ruin the lives of the most humans.' Coming from my world, it's hard to trust anyone who claims to be a God. Once bitten, twice shy, that kind of thing.

My honorable father is the only god of the world we come from, and he would never ruin the lives of humans--that is, not unless they had become souls too corrupted to suffer to live.

[But he thinks about that, about once bitten and twice shy, and about what makes him uncomfortable about being too confined, about the real reason he feels his jaw clench about Dirk Strider's dumb hat, even though it's irrational (like his desperate obsession with symmetry). About how it's not exactly what Shiro means but perhaps close enough that he can understand it. A little.]

I see. I suppose it would be difficult to change your mind with a single example.

If I-- No, when I become a true reaper, I will show you a god of death that cherishes the lives of humans.

[Oh geez he knew Kid would take this personally somehow. He should have kept his fat mouth shut.]

Look, Kid, it's not meant as any offense to you or your dad. I'm sure he's a great guy, and you're a pretty good person yourself. And besides that, it's not the whole 'cherishing the lives of humans' thing that bothers me about Gods anyway.

[He takes his role in life very seriously.

Even more now that he knows he has a brother, of who and what he is.]

What bothers you about gods?

[What was that about keeping his mouth shut?]

Oh no, we're not getting into this discussion.

[NOPE shutting it down now. It was already problematic enough when he tried to explain it to Marie.]

Why not? You're the one who mentioned it in the first place. To fail to elaborate when I ask isn't fair!

[Can't stop, won't stop.]

Because no matter how I explain it, you'll get offended. So I'm not going to.

[Still denied, Kid.]

And why would I be offended, if you're not even talking about me or my father?

[Kid is relentless, okay.]

I'm not sure, but I can still imagine the conversation ending with yelling.

Edited (I accidentally a word) 2013-05-12 02:14 (UTC)

...You presume to think I can't handle your honest opinion.

[Now he is offended.]

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