caughtinanetwork | 017

[He'd made the announcement individually to the few people that Ky knew she'd known, but he's sure there are more, people who might not expect her to vanish.]

Dizzy is gone. Back to our world...

[Not as important to the bubble, perhaps, as Zelda's disappearance, but he feels it more. He's not going to acknowledge that fact if he can't, though, not any more than he's already had to.

Which is why he's moving on.]

Has anyone ever done a survey of the different types of fighting that everyone here knows? It seems like we probably have a lot to teach each other, and I, for one, would be happy to learn something a little different. I currently use a sword and lightning magic, and while I can't teach the magic to those who don't have it, I've found that simply sparring against people from different schools of training has helped me to adapt my own technique.

But there's some things I can't learn simply by fighting, but things that might be nonetheless useful in the context of some battles, like firearms.

Perhaps if people could simply talk some about how battles go on their world, I'll be able to better determine strategy that should be used for the Defense Force.

And I wouldn't be opposed to learning something new, if anyone's in the mood to teach.

[A slight, and formal, smile.

See how carefully he's focusing on duty, on earnestness, instead of anything else? This is what he wants to be doing, how he wants to cope.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It's hard to win without it.

[Considering both he and Link had died, he's not really in a position to argue.]

I guess you're right.

That's why it's so important that we have the Defense Force here.

That's true. I guess I don't really know what I'm talking about. Sorry.

[This isn't his week...]

You know what you're talking about, I believe, but perhaps I don't...

Well I never really had back up so it's weird to expect it.

I see. More recently, I have had to deal with much less of it.

It'd be better to rely on your friends though. I think it's nice to have people you can trust like that. It's just...

[A heavy sigh comes from the speaker.]

Sometimes people go away, even if they don't mean to, so it's hard to count on them.

[It sounds to Ky like Sola is using friends to mean allies, a definition that Ky is quite familiar with.]

That much is unique to here.

[Unless they die, but that isn't quite the same.]

It's important to forge new connections, though, either way.

I guess, but I wonder what the point is sometimes, if people leave.

[There's the sound of fabric rustling as Sola lowers his chin to his knees.]

It hurts.

The point is that in knowing them, they left us better people.

[He bites down the urge to say 'and they're in a better place now' because that doesn't apply to this situation, as comforting as it is in others.]

That matters.

I know it matters, but it still hurts and it's hard. You miss Dizzy, don't you? Doesn't it hurt?

[Ky...would really rather not talk about missing Dizzy. It's easier to just not think about it, not to dwell on it.]

I worry about how she does back on our own world. That's what's most important.

[Normally Sola would let it go in recognizing that Ky was hurt by Dizzy's departure, but he's upset and misses Zelda and that puts him in a selfishly introspective mood.]

Don't lie! That's stupid. You miss her, everyone always misses their friends if they leave and it's really stupid to say you don't. It's like trying to not even care that they were here at all.

What good does it do to miss her?

[She won't even know that she's ever been here.]

I have more important things to focus on.

You sound heartless.

[Sola's tempted to hang up on him, but Ky is Johnny's friend, and while Johnny is sometimes friends with some weird people, he knows Ky can't actually be heartless, not really. He just doesn't understand how Ky can say anything is more important than losing your friends.]

[Ky reaches out to grip his desk, knuckles quickly turning white, but his voice, the thing that matters right now, stays calm and even.]

I've lost people before.

[Lost them more than Dizzy is lost. Grief isn't even the right word to apply here.

But Ky's been losing people all his life: his parents, and then his soldiers, then Kliff. At least he hasn't lost Dizzy because he's failed her. Not yet.]

But a clear head is all that's going to keep you from losing more. Perhaps less so here, with this situation, but...it serves no one to let yourself feel everything that you want to.

[And Ky's lived his life in service, and he can't handle everything that he wants to feel, doesn't know how.]

Its better to remember them. It's too sad and too mean to try and ignore that they were here at all. And besides, you can't just turn off feelings. They happen whether you want them or not. I think maybe you're just saying this stuff because you're sad.

[It makes sense when he thinks of it. He says things he doesn't mean when he's sad or tired or upset. Never with the calm that Ky's exhibiting right now, but the only alternative is Ky really doesn't care and that can't be the case or he wouldn't have mentioned Dizzy in his post at all.]

I'm not going to forget her. But there's a difference between that and talking about it too much, dwelling on her absence.

[Ky's calm is cracking a little now, but he's trying hard to keep it in check. He could totally turn off feelings, he had to stuff them down and keep moving.]

But if you don't talk about it at all then it's just like forgetting her. Missing people doesn't make you weak or anything you know.

[A lot of people seem to have that idea and Sola has no idea where it comes from. Here or not, his friends and loved ones are his strength. He'll do things for them he wouldn't have the courage to do otherwise, just so they'd be proud of they could see him.

Like Link.

Like Zelda.

The tightness in his chest that's pervaded since he found out she left the bubble loosens a little. Just because she's gone for now doesn't mean all her hard work will go to waste, or that she won't be proud of him for his triumphs should he ever get to tell her. It doesn't mean he cares for her any less than if she was here.

Sola's voice sounds a bit stronger when he speaks again.]

It's more like strength.

Missing them, that's private.

[He might talk about it with a priest, but there hasn't been one here that Ky can treat as a priest, that Ky can talk to that way.]

I can have her in my heart without bringing it up.

[She matters to him, but that doesn't mean that his feelings about her matter to anyone else.

Nor should they.]

[There's another long pause before Sola speaks again, chagrined for breaching Ky's privacy.]

...Sorry.

It will be fine.

I'm just gonna go. If you need me for anything with the defense force, let me know, okay? Maybe it's not the best since I don't focus on one thing, but I can do a lot with all my weapons and tools.

[Has he misspoken, said something he shouldn't have?]

I'm sure you can still do a lot.

I'll let you know.

voice

replicatedcourage - 2013-06-23 07:20 (UTC) - Expand

017 | Video

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice

voice