[Voice/ action in Albert's apartment]

[shippingmath]

[There's a sound in the background before anyone starts talking, a sound that is almost suspiciously like the loading of a gun. Before anything more ominous happens, though, the noises stop, and a man's voice speaks up.]

Well, this is hella entertaining. They're getting uncreative with their invasive afflictions. You'd think they'd be eager to come up with new and interesting ways to get reactions out of us, instead of rehashing shit they've done before.

For you newbies, it means that this has happened before. At least this time I'm not fucking barking.

This is Dirk, by the way.

[For a few moments, there are some more random sounds- a little mechanical click-click-click, that continues until the recording cuts out.]

Comments

[video]

[shippingmath]

I've spoken to this chick all of maybe once. [Davesprite's bad at introducing his family to his friends.]

So I'm sorry I'm not a mind reader. Be real, you'd have taken a moment or two to figure it out if I hadn't introduced myself.

[Though Dirk has... a rather distinct method of talking. Which would have helped in knowing who it was.]

[video]

[fundemetal]

You should talk to her more often. She's pretty cool.

Yeah, I would have. [He grins cheekily.] But come on, I had to have some fun with this.

[video]

[shippingmath]

Well, you've given me a perfect conversation-starter. "That guy in your body sure can be an ass, huh?"

[But from the way he smiles as he says it, he's obviously joking.]

[video]

[fundemetal]

[Leo can tell he's joking, but he also can't resist joking back. So he pretends to be shocked and offended by the statement.]

Yeah? Well, two can play that game. I can go talk to the guy in your body and say the exact same thing.

[video]

[shippingmath]

That's nothing he doesn't know already. We're acquainted. That's the first thing anyone learns about me.

[video]

[fundemetal]

Of course you already know each other.

[He sighs, but it sounds exaggerated and fake.]

Guess I'm a special snowflake cause the first thing I learned about you was that you thought my table was sweet.

[video]

[shippingmath]

You are a unique and delicate flower, all right. You're the lucky lottery winner, 'cept instead of a million bucks you got a friendship with me.

[video]

[fundemetal]

Is it too late to ask for the million bucks instead?

[He laughs. Honestly, he wouldn't trade Dirk for even a billion dollars.]

[video]

[shippingmath]

Entirely too late. That offer had to be redeemed within two days of meeting me. You're shit outta luck, bro.

[video]

[fundemetal]

That's a short return policy. [He laughs.] Guess I'll just have to deal with what I've got.