caughtinanetwork

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[ When the feed begins, it shows John (~~Aunt Nancy~~ Anansi) perched on a tree branch, legs crossed. His six, spider arms are idly juggling six, round objects -- apples, a crystal ball, etc. It was yours???? Well, it's John's now. What's holding his SFC? ....Webs. Well, okay then. ]

Hey guys! I am totally a gross spider now, haha. Anyway, does anyone here know why nothing grows in the winter? No?

Well, I do. Because I have aaaaaaaall the stories. All of them! I almost had all the wisdom too but, well, that is a story for another time.

Anyway, here I go.

Once upon a time, the Winter time used to be no different from Spring. Sure, snowflakes would still fall and the land would still be coated by miles of frost during this season, but the flowers and the trees still thrived and grew. Everybody still feasted during Winter, and all was well.

This was because Lady Harvest, dear Lady Harvest -- she's lovely you'll love her -- sang to the crops every night. She had such a magnificent voice that the plants would forget their chill and sleep under her guidance.

Now, as kind and benevolent as Lady Harvest was, she still made all creatures, human and animal, promise that they would only harvest enough to satisfy their hunger; she was, after all, just one deity and she couldn't possibly keep up with the demands of the whole world everyday if they were going to be greedy!

Everybody promised.

But some lied through their teeth.

One of the liars, surprise surprise, was me. Hey, she had a lot of delicious potatoes, could you blame me?

I did not want Lady Harvest to think ill of me though, so I devised a cunning plan!

During the late afternoon, before Lady Harvest sang and after everybody reclined back to their houses, I approached Brother Tiger. Brother Tiger and I have never been in the best terms, but the good favors I did him outweighed the malicious ones, so he did not pounce me. He asked me, "John, what is it that you want now?"

"I'm hurt, Brother Tiger. Why do you always assume I'm up to something?" I crawl up next to Brother Tiger and I ask him, "So why do you, proud king of the jungle, have the same rights as a common spider like me? Everyday during Winter, when I take one potato, you also take one potato! Excuse me, but shouldn't you be taking ten potatoes?"

Brother Tiger, with his mind clouded in fury that he even forgot his dislike of potatoes, ran to where Lady Harvest was singing. He roared and he roared at her that Lady Harvest was so shocked, she stopped singing to the crops. While the plants shivered and cried, I made myself a net from my spider webs and hurried them away. When Lady Harvest turned around, there were no more crops to sing to!

During these moments, Lady Harvest began to doubt herself. She wondered if she weren't strong enough for the plants, and since she had neither friends nor family, nobody was there to invalidate her insecurities -- so she ran away to the kingdom of God, never to be seen again.

That night, I feasted with my friends until we couldn't take another more bite. But there was TOO much food that we couldn't possibly eat them all, a world's worth of food, so they rotted away. From those days onward, Lady Harvest never returned, so all the plants shivered and died.

And now you know why nothing grows in Winter anymore!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Dave seems legitimately startled this time. He thought it was just John being stupid and messing with him.

He hadn't actually considered the other being serious about it. And honestly. He wasn't sure how to react. There was a lot wrong with this. A lot of curiosity (which was winning out).] Don't you got a girlfriend? [His voice might have cracked just slightly.]

[ John pouts, but he didn't shift from his position. ]

She's not going to find out.

Is that a legitimate excuse to have sloppy makeouts with your best bro? I mean. Thought you weren't interested in dudes.

I am a spider and you are a bird. Do you really think that applies here? Besides...

[ John leans close enough so their noses are booping and he could feel Dave's breathing. ]

You're just stalling. Why do you have to make everything complicated?

I can tell you now, pretty sure neither of us are girls.

[That? That is the sound of Dave's breath getting caught in his throat and a faint flush starting to appear on his features.]

'M not makin' it complicated. Just gotta make sure. Remember?

Dave, I don't care. Do I look like I care? Because I don't.

Yeeeeah, I remember. Do you want me to make the move because you're a shy bird maiden?

Well ain't you a cute lil' liberal.

[Oh no. Fuck you John. There's no way he's going to let that comment slide.

They aren't quite hands, but have soft feathers brush against your cheeks to keep your face still. He's a little clumsy with the kiss, but hey. They're in a tree, and he's not used to this. At all.]

[ JUST AS PLANNED. ]

[ Mmmmokay, good. Dave sucks at this, but hey, John didn't expect him to be a winner. He wraps his limbs around Dave (neck, waist, lower waist) to pull him closer and maybe deepen the kiss. ]

[He has to shift his weight slightly to accommodate the slight change. It would be pretty dumb if they ended this kiss because one of them almost fell out of the tree.

Pretty sure Strider's brain went into standby for awhile. He doesn't even hesitate to kiss back or be bothered that John was deepening the kiss. Hell. His conscious can scream at him later.]

[ Okay, somebody's getting into it. ]

[ The limbs formerly stationed around Dave's necks creep up to cup his face and tilt it for a better angle. John, for a few seconds, breaks away to move his glasses up and the kissing continues. ]

[ It's pretty obvious that he's not thinking about girlfriends or friendships straining, and that he never did. He's a trickster god; consequences are too heavy and too serious for him. He prefers to focus on the warmth and softness before him, conscience taking a back seat. ]

[Things sure are going to be awkward when this stuff passes. It'll probably just end with Dave refusing to ever talk about it and act like it wasn't a thing that happened.

Dave was too busy being curious about the taste of John's mouth and his acute awareness of where all John's arms are resting.]

[ Dave tastes weird. He does not taste like strawberry flavored mint cake, but rather, he tastes like Dave, apple and bird, and oh look, he is going to taste more of that Dave, apple and bird as tongue comes in the equation and John curls his tongue around Dave's. He shudders at that. ]

[ His limbs are doing all sorts of crazy stuff, meanwhile. Some of them are rubbing his back, tangling his fingers in Dave's hair and running up his soft wings. This is so weird and so good, wow. ]

[Dave doesn't even know what exactly what John tastes like. But he doesn't seem to actually mind, whatever it is. He's too busy trying to not make ridiculously embarrassing noises into that kiss. Dear god, he usually isn't the vocal type. Or maybe he was? Maybe it's part of being a bird.

He ruffles his feathers a little, and this is very pleasing. He could get used to this. Even if the skin on the back of his neck is a little too sensitive for his liking. But the fingers through his feathers are terribly pleasing.]

[ They could only kiss for so long until oxygen starts being a problem. John pulls away, face flushed and panting. He runs a hand up Dave's wings and settles a pair of them around his neck. ]

Nice.

[He flaps his wings a bit. Mostly to get any awkward sticking feathers to behave right. He settles down for a minute.

He's waiting for his brain to catch up with him.]

Okay, now I have the story of the cool spider guy macking with a bird dude.

[Oh there's his brain.

Telling him this was an incredibly bad idea. Like, John totally has a girlfriend. Who's here. What are you doing Dave? Other then being stupid.]

Uh huh. And that's all you really wanted I'm guessing.

[ Well. Yes. Wait. It's a trap. Time to respond with a well-articulated, sensible reply. ]

Uhhhhh.

[Gosh this was stupid. Never telling John about his kissing history. Or lackof really.]

That sure was an intelligent reply.

[ John lets go of Dave, his hands falling to his side. The confidence and shameless air he gives off washes away, and for once, he is more John than Anansi, insecure and 13. ]

[ He looks away. ]

...Sorry. I wasn't... thinking.

We can chalk that up to harmless homo bro experimentation if you want.

[He shifts from one foot to the other awkwardly. Now he really wants his sunglasses back. This is too awkward for him.]

How about we try and not make this a big deal. I rather not have our broship be awkward as fuck. I also don't want your girlfriend potentially ending me for macking on her spider boyfriend. I can never be too sure with troll romance being crazy confusing most of the time.

Okay. Yeah. Sure. Um.

[ There is a cautionary tale somewhere in all of this but -- okay, no, be John first. John. ]

If I do anything stupid, please spray me with water. Consequences and being a trickster god doesn't really mix all that well.

I'll just go bird man on you. It'll be intense and you won't know what hit you.

[Long pause...] Sooo...yeah. We're moving on from this faster then a jack rabbit in the summer heat.

You know it, dude. Water under the bridge.

Cool...

[What do you say in a situation like this?!]

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[Action] need hammertime icons

[Action] Always need Hammertime icons. Always.

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[Action] Icons I should never be allowed to use

[Action] needs more wings

[Action] I only have one bird icon. Bird icons are hard

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