Karkat Vantas ♋ carcinoGeneticist (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bethehugejerk) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
caughtinanetwork2012-12-16 06:51 pm
bethehugejerk) wrote in caughtinanetwork2012-12-16 06:51 pm
043 ♋ [VIDEO]
[Appearing on screen is a troll, grey-skinned and scowling, utterly unamused as he holds up a tan choker with a heart design. Guess who Sandy Claws visited?]
Thank you, Vatheon, for this pointless and utterly useless gift. This is definitely what I wanted, and you have outdone yourself in practice of earth holidays. I actually liked the stupid lobster until it went and left me this piece of crap.
But if other posts and personal discovery have told me anything, things have been lost and sent where they don't belong. So, I'll make the guess that this thing actually belongs to someone, which is the one saving grace to stop me from throwing it out with the trash. You're welcome.
... On that same subject, though.
[He shifts, coughs.]
If anyone has a--it should look like a crab monster, okay? This white crab thing, a completely badass one. If you have it, just contact me in private and I'll come get it, alright?
Thank you, Vatheon, for this pointless and utterly useless gift. This is definitely what I wanted, and you have outdone yourself in practice of earth holidays. I actually liked the stupid lobster until it went and left me this piece of crap.
But if other posts and personal discovery have told me anything, things have been lost and sent where they don't belong. So, I'll make the guess that this thing actually belongs to someone, which is the one saving grace to stop me from throwing it out with the trash. You're welcome.
... On that same subject, though.
[He shifts, coughs.]
If anyone has a--it should look like a crab monster, okay? This white crab thing, a completely badass one. If you have it, just contact me in private and I'll come get it, alright?
[video]
[...Oh. He's just glaring now, and maybe his fins are flaring a bit more.]
Shut up! I'm not fuckin' transparent at all. Maybe I'm agitated about somethin' entirely unrelated, ewer think about that?
[video]
[Check out this fat load of belief on his face. Sooo believing you. Not kidding about that, no, nope.]
[video]
[SUCH A CONVINCING ARGUMENT, how can you deny that answer. How?]
[video]
[After a moment (to let the look sink in), he speaks.]
You do realize that if someone actually deigned to confess their flushed feelings for me via awful neck accessory, I would decline, right? Considering I have no interest in pointless, girly trinkets like that, let alone one with hearts sewn on?
And that the above scenario is setting aside the obvious fact that I am both taken in the flushed quadrant and thoroughly satisfied with that status?
[video]
... Yeah, I know.
[video]
You didn't get any "gift" yourself, did you? I didn't see one when I found mine at the door.
[video]
Nope, and I prefer it that way. Checked all my stuff and ewerything as soon as I saw the surplus of people bitchin' about hawin' useless junk. Ewerything's here and nothin' new.
[His fins fan out proudly as he looks equally as self-assured.]
They probably knew not to cross me, it's better for them that they didn't.
[video]
[... He can still tease him on this subject, right?]
At least nothing of yours is missing. Half of everyone is taking this whole post as excuse to come bother me about what I lost, even when it's none of their business, and them not having it should be clue blatant and easy for them to not bother because they're of no use to me.
[video]
[HUFF]
ANYWAY, you know they're gonna be nooklickers no matter what you do. You giwe them any hint at somethin' they can be a jackass ower, they're gonna come at ya full force like the insufferable fuckwits they are.
[video]
You know, put that way, I don't even know why I bothered to think they wouldn't. Common sense is as beyond them as a proper system of romance is to humans, let alone actual fucking respect.