caughtinanetwork

[ When the feed begins, it shows John (~~Aunt Nancy~~ Anansi) perched on a tree branch, legs crossed. His six, spider arms are idly juggling six, round objects -- apples, a crystal ball, etc. It was yours???? Well, it's John's now. What's holding his SFC? ....Webs. Well, okay then. ]

Hey guys! I am totally a gross spider now, haha. Anyway, does anyone here know why nothing grows in the winter? No?

Well, I do. Because I have aaaaaaaall the stories. All of them! I almost had all the wisdom too but, well, that is a story for another time.

Anyway, here I go.

Once upon a time, the Winter time used to be no different from Spring. Sure, snowflakes would still fall and the land would still be coated by miles of frost during this season, but the flowers and the trees still thrived and grew. Everybody still feasted during Winter, and all was well.

This was because Lady Harvest, dear Lady Harvest -- she's lovely you'll love her -- sang to the crops every night. She had such a magnificent voice that the plants would forget their chill and sleep under her guidance.

Now, as kind and benevolent as Lady Harvest was, she still made all creatures, human and animal, promise that they would only harvest enough to satisfy their hunger; she was, after all, just one deity and she couldn't possibly keep up with the demands of the whole world everyday if they were going to be greedy!

Everybody promised.

But some lied through their teeth.

One of the liars, surprise surprise, was me. Hey, she had a lot of delicious potatoes, could you blame me?

I did not want Lady Harvest to think ill of me though, so I devised a cunning plan!

During the late afternoon, before Lady Harvest sang and after everybody reclined back to their houses, I approached Brother Tiger. Brother Tiger and I have never been in the best terms, but the good favors I did him outweighed the malicious ones, so he did not pounce me. He asked me, "John, what is it that you want now?"

"I'm hurt, Brother Tiger. Why do you always assume I'm up to something?" I crawl up next to Brother Tiger and I ask him, "So why do you, proud king of the jungle, have the same rights as a common spider like me? Everyday during Winter, when I take one potato, you also take one potato! Excuse me, but shouldn't you be taking ten potatoes?"

Brother Tiger, with his mind clouded in fury that he even forgot his dislike of potatoes, ran to where Lady Harvest was singing. He roared and he roared at her that Lady Harvest was so shocked, she stopped singing to the crops. While the plants shivered and cried, I made myself a net from my spider webs and hurried them away. When Lady Harvest turned around, there were no more crops to sing to!

During these moments, Lady Harvest began to doubt herself. She wondered if she weren't strong enough for the plants, and since she had neither friends nor family, nobody was there to invalidate her insecurities -- so she ran away to the kingdom of God, never to be seen again.

That night, I feasted with my friends until we couldn't take another more bite. But there was TOO much food that we couldn't possibly eat them all, a world's worth of food, so they rotted away. From those days onward, Lady Harvest never returned, so all the plants shivered and died.

And now you know why nothing grows in Winter anymore!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I do. Duh.

You seem to be getting tired. Why don't you drop by here? I have fruit and beverages.

Not used to the chicken feet.

What would happen if I said, sure? I don't know. Seems like an awful lot of work to get myself there if I'm tired.

[ Did John's tone drop? Yep. ]

I bet it's not that far away.

Fuck. Fine. Since we're bros and you're obviously not moving.

[Somehow he gets the feed to end.

And John will probably hear the sounds of large wings and hear the rustle of a tree as Dave lands.]

[ He smiles at him when he lands and gestures Dave to sit next to him. ]

Hey, gorgeous.

[He raises an eyebrow. You can actually see that. He couldn't get his shades on. Which might explain his avoidance to give John eye contact.

He hops over to the tree John is in.]

I get it Egbert. You think I'm really hot. Most people do.

[ He doesn't say anything. He just wordlessly hands Dave an apple. ]

[And Dave has to grab it with one of his feet(now talons). He's surprisingly not as weirded out doing this after opening doors and other things. That, and dear god having badass balance was fucking amazing.]

[ John iiiinches closer so he could take a closer peek at Dave's eyes. ]

[Dave sees what you're trying to do John. He shields his face a bit with one of his wings. Gonna be a little sneakier then that.

Damn, Dave sure fucking loves apples though.]

Dave, there is nothing wrong with your eyes. I think they are actually really cool.

You're probably the only one.

[He peeks a glance at John, looking pretty suspicious about the other and what motives he might have for saying that.] They aren't exactly the normal issued eyeballs.

Well, screw them.

[ He holds up bottled water for Dave. ]

Refreshing beverage?

I only got so many feet to hold shit with. I'd ask you to spare a hand, but we've beaten that joke over the head way too many times already.

The apple was good enough, thanks.

Fiiiine.

[ Guh, can't sit still. John reaches a hand to touch one of Dave's feathers. ]

[Dave responds by ruffling them a bit. He doesn't bother to stop the other though. No reason why. Besides. Apparently petting is a thing he didn't think he'd want, but here he is being part bird and finding it surprisingly satisfying.]

[ Giggles! He's scratching the Dave's weird arm wing thing now with two of his hands. He is having so much fun. ]

[He lets out a fairly content sound at that.

Oh crap. That was kind of embarrassing.]

[ Oh, that was precious. John can't help it. He steals a kiss on Dave's cheek. ]

[Woah, casanova. Suddenly stealing cheek kisses.

Dave: try to recover from making embarrassing sounds.] Think you just stole my cheek's virginity. Only disgusting gross smuppet kisses have ever touched those cheeks. I can hear the crowd of girls cry in realization they don't get to be my first kiss.

Dave. Shut up.

[ John looks at Dave's lips. Thank God it's not a beak amirite. He raises his eyebrows, obviously interested, and slips a hand on Dave's cheek, leaning closer to advertise his intentions to the heavens but not really doing anything because he needs to know Dave wants this too. Stealing lip kisses is pathetic. ]

[ Your move, Strider. ]

[Dave seems legitimately startled this time. He thought it was just John being stupid and messing with him.

He hadn't actually considered the other being serious about it. And honestly. He wasn't sure how to react. There was a lot wrong with this. A lot of curiosity (which was winning out).] Don't you got a girlfriend? [His voice might have cracked just slightly.]

[ John pouts, but he didn't shift from his position. ]

She's not going to find out.

Is that a legitimate excuse to have sloppy makeouts with your best bro? I mean. Thought you weren't interested in dudes.

I am a spider and you are a bird. Do you really think that applies here? Besides...

[ John leans close enough so their noses are booping and he could feel Dave's breathing. ]

You're just stalling. Why do you have to make everything complicated?

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[Action] need hammertime icons

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[Action] Always need Hammertime icons. Always.

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