caughtinanetwork | 1st record

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alright so just kind of chilling here on the beach instead of some underwater city this info guide talks about
and you know thatd be kind of cool if it werent for one major issue
what the fuck just happened
seriously i think i just got whiplash from trying to figure out where that five minutes went so wrong
i mean the first time i got teleported randomly at least it wasnt just me
landed right on my ass confused as hell but i wasnt the only one
its easier to sit there and look like a tool when youre in a group trying to figure out what the hells going on
its lame to lay on a beach alone looking like a tool getting wet sand in places sand doesnt need to be

read over the whole welcome thing so ok cool i get it
stranger shit has happened i guess so why the fuck not
moving on to try and be somewhat productive here
sup names dave
tell me theres someone that knows me here cause itll make this shit a lot easier
or worse
idk i guess well see
like id say something is better than nothing but i can think of a lot of cases where that wouldnt really be true
so for better or worse i guess
isnt there like a saying or something that knowings half the battle
does that apply to this situation?
well it does now because i say so

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sorry dude i legit dont understand that blackrom crap otherwise id explain better
no matter how many trashy romance novels you read to me its never gonna chance
and yeah the thing with you and gamzee lasted for a good long while before he got all delusional about the new session
alcohol is a drink that fucks with peoples minds
it makes you act like a totally different person and you can get addicted to it really easily and it can ruin your life
rose made some booze and then she just didnt stop
like not only is the shit disgusting but it fucks up your health really bad too
alcoholism is the word for when you become an alcoholic and pretty much need the shit to get by day to day
but you only saw it as she was happier and most stupid and had a better sense of humor
pretty sure kanaya was starting to get real sick of her shit though
you just werent around her enough to get why it was so bad

OH!
OH.
THAT.
OKAY, NO, FUTURE ME JUST HASN'T HAD THE CHANCE TO EXPERIENCE WHAT A RAVING DUMBFUCK IT MAKES YOU WHEN YOU DRINK IT.
JEGUS, THOUGH, YOU CAN GET ADDICTED TO THAT STUFF?
ROSE MIGHT BE A PAIN IN THE ASS WITH HER SNARKY HORSESHIT BUT SHE WAS AT LEAST INTELLIGENT IN THE FEW TIMES SHE'S SHOWED UP HERE.
THEN AGAIN
SHE WAS THE GENIUS WHO THOUGHT "LET'S BLOW EVERYTHING UP" WAS THE RIGHT WAY TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM OF YOUR SESSION.
SO HOW SHOULD I KNOW WHAT GOT INTO HER ABOUT IT.
BUT LET'S GO BACK TO TEREZI FOR A MINUTE.
YOU SAID SHE GOT HER VISION BACK SOMEHOW?

[Keep him away from-Oh god dammit. Why can't that thing just stay lost? He guesses it's not all bad, it's good for bro at least so he has some company. But still. Dave's going to have to remember to watch his back.]

if i had just pulled out the sword i would have gotten blood on me

[Yeah, subject change. He can't think of he didn't want to touch the body when said body was his bro right here talking to him.]

the trolls kind of hard to miss
basically a teenage alien juggalo that types in purple and reeks of crazy
hes here from what i heard

yeah he didnt get it because luckily rose didnt share
and shes a pretty complicated girl so who the hell knows whats going on with her most of the time
okay so assuming you know about the whole dancestor thing
id ask if you know who aranea is but that would be a waste of time and another explanation i dont feel like going into
she was basically a god tier sylph of light and offered to heal terezis eyes for her
at first she said no because she liked the way she was
but apparently whenever gamzee taunted her about her blindness it pissed her off and drove her to go back to aranea and take her up on her offer

[What, no, you don't get blood on you when you do it right and pull it out in a good clean vertical- okay no. He needs to stop thinking about this now. Much as he wants to be right and for his bro to not be a pussy about things like this, it's getting disturbing.]

purple juggalo troll. gotcha.

saw a few troll douches type in purple. pretty sure they werent juggalos so thats only two outta three.

[He's thinking of the Amporas, actually.]

hot damn
yeah i cant argue with that i mean if youre so badass then fuck take your crown and perch on the hill like you own it
sounds like you got all you need right there i cant argue those reasons

DANCESTOR?
IS THAT WHAT YOU CALL THE PRE-SCRATCH TROLLS?
I HAVEN'T MET ARANEA BUT I'VE HEARD OF HER.
VRISKA'S... DANCESTOR, RIGHT?
I STILL DON'T GET IT, THOUGH.
WHY WOULD TEREZI LET THAT GET UNDER HER SKIN SO MUCH.
SHE LIKED BEING BLIND, YOU SAID IT YOURSELF, AND SHE NEVER STRUCK ME LIKE THE KIND TO COMPROMISE HER PRINCIPLES JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE WAS TAUNTING HER ABOUT SHIT.

[Dave's done with that part of the conversation. It was easier to talk about with Terezi back when he was right there. There's a reason he hasn't spoken of it since.]

theres two kinds of purple for trolls
theres the seadouche purple and then theres the bugfuck crazy purple
you gotta be careful which is which with these things

Verily, Sir Strider, I will remember to remind you of the act of asking for the real Bugs Bunny.

[Hurr dee durr.]

So! You are here, we are on the beach, but hopefully we will be fixing our bubble city soon enough. What do you want to do now?

to be honest the term seems kind of lame to me but whatever
its apparently because to you they were your ancestors but to them they were your descendants
and yeah shes the serket of their group
i didnt really get it either and i guess neither did terezi
once again
no idea how the fuck this whole blackrom thing works so i dont know why gamzee got to her the way he did
i know she regretted her decision and hid her eyes from everyone for a really long time because she was ashamed of it
but whats done was done and she couldnt change that

[That gets a smile out of him, it's kind of hard not to around jade sometimes.]

I dunno. I mean, I'm still pretty fucking confused but at this point it's like what the fuck else could happen? Not really letting anything surprise me now. I've got to find Bro some time later, he's going to hook me up with some AJ and junk food. What do you want to do?

right. sure.

wouldnt want to mix m up by accident. boy would my face be red.

THIS ISN'T EVEN A BLACKROM THING ANYMORE
IT'S A WHAT THE HELL, SOMETHING'S WRONG THING.
WHATEVER'S GOING ON ISN'T HEALTHY IF IT MADE HER THAT UNHAPPY WITH HERSELF THAT SHE'D CHANGE SOMETHING SHE USED TO ENJOY
ON TOP OF THE FAYGO ADDICTION YOU ALREADY MENTIONED.
I GIVE UP.
I'M JUST GLAD I'M HERE AND DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT MESS
BUT THEY NEED AN AUSPISTICE OR SOMETHING TO JUST BREAK UP WHATEVER'S GOING ON.
NOW WHAT ELSE WAS THERE...

[A pause while he looks back at that message from earlier. Skim past what's been covered, and...]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN JADE LOOKED POSSESSED???

so i know you said to meet you by the elevator later
but where are you staying now with the city flooded

[It feels so weird to try and ask if he can stay with him. He shouldn't have to ask, he knows he shouldn't have to ask. But after three years it feels just as weird not to ask no matter how stupid and lame he feels for it. Because what if Bro's got other things now? What if he's actually got his own life in this place that he doesn't need some awkward teen butting in on?]

it was when she was describing it
like she went into detail on why but it all had to do with how it was about him and how he said it because when anyone else said it it never bothered her
so the whole reason why she changed her eyes was because of whatever blackrom reasoning she had for it or something
and yeah you said something about auspistice and beat yourself up over that but thats what you do with everything so i didnt really pay much attention to that part

and just what i said
something was seriously fucking wrong with jade
she wasnt herself and looked scary as hell
but i only had like barely a minute to process that fact before she teleported us away so i cant really answer that one too well either

[Don't worry, Dave. Bro's already got one awkward teen around in his living space. Or, well, he used to. Shit's been hitting the fan all around with Davesprite these past few weeks. From awkward curses to the sprite getting sent home, to the city flooding, to magical comas.

Point is, he's cool with another bro around. He's just wondering if maybe Dave'd rather stay with his pals.]

everywhere and nowhere. dont really have a set place here on the island.

im staying with your sprite down in the bubble but i dunno if well ever get that place fixed. i sure as hell hope so. just moved the most cushy futon ever into the bedroom. that shits comfy as hell.

IN OTHER WORDS SHIT HAS HIT THE THRESHER ON ALL FRONTS
AND NOW WE, IN PARADOX SPACE, ARE COVERED IN THE REEKING RESULTS.
I STILL HARDLY UNDERSTAND ANYTHING.
I CAN'T GET MY HEAD AROUND WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME ABOUT GAMZEE.
I DOUBT I EVER WILL FULLY UNDERSTAND WHAT'S GOING ON UNLESS I GO BACK TO EXPERIENCE THOSE THREE YEARS MYSELF, BUT I AM FRANKLY HOPING I WON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.
I DON'T THINK I COULD POSSIBLY BE MORE GLAD THAT THE WORST I HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT RIGHT NOW IS THE BUBBLE FLOODING.
BUT NOW THAT I'VE GRILLED YOU FOR EVERYTHING I CAN ABOUT THE SITUATION THOUGH I SHOULD PROBABLY GIVE YOU THE CHANCE FOR THE REVERSE.
USUALLY I HAVE A BIG SPIEL ABOUT THIS PLACE I GIVE OUT BUT PART IS DECIDEDLY IRRELEVANT UNTIL VATHEON'S BARRIER GETS FIXED.
SO ASK ME ANYTHING, I'LL ANSWER WHAT I CAN, AND FILL IN ANYTHING ELSE IMPORTANT THAT COMES UP.

Edited 2013-04-30 21:40 (UTC)

[Dave's been living with other teens for three years, he kind of just really wants to go back to staying with his bro like before all this shit hit the fan.]

got room for one more

anything i had to ask you was pretty much shot dead upon the realization that youre three years behind so not much else to say
pretty sure im ready to just kick back and worry about this bubble shit too
and the fact that my bro whos been dead for the past three years is suddenly alive and his teen self is here too and teen mom and all these fucking striders who arent me and how all these people i dont even know or have barely heard of suddenly know me a lot better than i think im comfortable with and theres fucking chocobos and pokemon running around
but nah im cool with it all
just running chill with everything now

[Bro's still a little surprised at this because, yeah, there sure is a possibility it'll be awkward to live with the guy you found impaled on his own sword. Granted, that didn't stop Davesprite either. Like person like sprite.

Either way, it's a relief. Attempting to cope with this shit is much better than avoiding it, especially when said shit is your older brother. Or, you know, father. That's another one of those things Bro fears may actually come up some day, because he doubts Dave's ignorant to the ectobiology shenanigans.]

yeah. provided the place doesnt get washed away.

guess we could always get a treehouse on the island instead. the sprite bro would love that shit. kids got some weirdass bird habits.

BULLSHIT.
IF THAT USELESS BABBLE IS "COOL WITH IT" THEN I AM MY OWN MOTHER, WHICH IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR MORE REASONS THAN I CARE TO EXPLAIN FOR THE SAKE OF A JOKE.
I MEANT ABOUT THIS PLACE AND WHAT'S GOING ON HERE, STUPID.
I'VE LIVED HERE OVER TWO YEARS, AND EVEN IF I'M NOT THE FIRST FROM OUR SECTION OF EXISTENCE TO HAVE SHOWN UP, I AM THE ONE WHO'S BEEN AROUND LONGEST AND REMEMBERS THE MOST.
SPEAKING OF
I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT A POKEMON IS BUT CHOCOBOS ARE FINE.
I HAVE ONE, AND SO DO A FEW OTHER TROLLS HERE, AND YOU HAD ONE YOURSELF BEFORE.
YOUR "TEEN BRO" AND "TEEN MOM" ARE FROM THE POST-SCRATCH HUMAN SESSION.
JOHN AND JADE'S TEEN GRANDPARENTS ARE HERE TOO, FOR THAT MATTER.
AND THE OTHER PEOPLE WHO KNEW YOU TALKED TO YOU IN TIMES YOU WERE HERE BEFORE, BUT AS SAID, YOU JUST DON'T REMEMBER.
AS SOMEONE WHO GOT TRAPPED INTO TALKING BACKWARDS TO JOHN AFTER HE ALREADY HAD THE TIME TO GET TO KNOW ME, IT IS NOT THAT HARD TO DEAL WITH.
JUST TELL THEM TO FUCK OFF IF YOU NEED YOUR SPACE BECAUSE IT IS NOT A CRIME TO WANT A LITTLE BREATHING ROOM WHEN YOU'RE STILL DEALING WITH WHAT THIS PLACE EVEN IS.

[Considering Dave's got no problems tossing around the phrase teen mom and fully accepting that Rose's mom is technically his mom, he knows damned well but he's never going to even bother with the whole technically dad thing. Bro's just his most ironic coolest big bro ever, that's all there is to that.

He's glad the question didn't make things awkward, not that he thought anything could make it more awkward than it already was, but still.]

sounds like either way itd be cool
i mean itd suck if your place got trashed with a brand new futon and everything but shit happens
if we gotta get a badass treehouse then thats what we can do

Hmmm...I sure don't want to impede on your AJ time! You are probably going to need it with all the shenanigans that are continuing on our lives. I can just head back to the village and see about finding a hut for you, and you can go meet up with Bro.

seems to me that words like cool and badass are goddamn redundant in the sense that the placell be ours.

anything instantly becomes cool and badass when theres striders involved. its a universal law. couldnt help it if we wanted to.

[Yup. See. Now they're making progress. Now they're taking the elephant out back to shoot and bury it, pretending everything is cool. The conversation feels a whole lot more pleasant now.]

lucky for you i actually get that joke and all the reasons behind it aside from the obvious
a pokemon is the eevee that jade has theres a metric fuckton of other species of them but no one knows if others are here or not i guess
sufferer said he was gonna give me back game bro so i dont have to worry about that and itll be pretty cool to have my own chocobo
already knew about the whole from the other session thing cause rose did a lot of research on it
doesnt make it any fucking less weird though
to be honest i dont really care much about this place
like the whole welcome brochure thing was enough to give me a gist on whats going on
not sure what else there would be to know other than realizing when i see the words nostalgia nook and laugh that ive been around trolls too long
i mean yeah on one hand a little breathing room would be nice but at the same time ive had nothing but breathing room for the past three years so its time to get off my ass man up and just deal with shit as it comes

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