Karkat Vantas ♋ carcinoGeneticist (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bethehugejerk) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
caughtinanetwork2013-07-26 11:02 am
bethehugejerk) wrote in caughtinanetwork2013-07-26 11:02 am
046 ♋ [TEXT]
WHAT FOUL AND MERCILESS ENTITY ROLLED OUT OF THE SPECIES APPROPRIATE SLUMBER APPARATUS AND DECIDED TO INVENT TIME
WHY, IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS, DID THIS ASSHOLE INSTILL INTO LIVING BEINGS THE CONCEPT OF THINGS HAPPENING BEFORE AND AFTER EACH OTHER
AND WHY DO I HAVE TO BE AFFLICTED WITH THIS WHEN I'M NOT EVEN A FUCKING TIME PLAYER.
WAS IT NOT ENOUGH TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE ENDLESS STABLE TIME LOOPS HOLDING THE SHODDY STICKS AND TWINE OF OUR TIMELINE TOGETHER?
WHAT ABOUT THE FLUX OF PEOPLE BACK AND FORTH FROM DIFFERENT SPOTS ALONG THAT LINE LIKE BACKWASH FROM AN ILL-CLEANED MOUTH INTO A SOULMELTING BOTTLE OF FAYGO???
WELL I GUESS THE FUCK NOT, BECAUSE HERE I AM BEING FORCED TO DEAL WITH OVER FIVE YEARS WORTH OF MEMORIES LAID OVER THE TOP OF EACH OTHER LIKE PARADOX SPACE DECIDED TO MAKE A PARTICULARLY AWFUL SANDWICH OUT OF THEM.
SAID SANDWICH HAS THEN BEEN FORCE FED DIRECTLY INTO MY THINK PAN
I AM OVERSTUFFED WITH RECOLLECTION AND REMEMBRANCE
MY BRAIN WOULD VOMIT IF IT WERE PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE. CONTEMPLATE THAT FOR A MINUTE.
OR HOWEVER LONG, I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT THE UNITS, AND NONE OF IT WILL APPROXIMATE THE SCREAMING HEADACHE CURRENTLY DECIMATING MY CRANIAL UNIT.
COULD I NOT HAVE GONE THROUGH THIS IN EASILY DIGESTED PIECES
WOULD THAT BE SO FUCKING HARD TO DO.
SURE, SEND ME BACK A COUPLE HOURS THAT FIRST TIME, BUT NO! YOU SCIENTIST NOOKMONGERS JUST *HAD* TO GIVE ME THE FULL THREE YEARS.
WHO CARES THAT I WAS ALREADY 15 AND A HALF IN EARTH YEARS, I OBVIOUSLY NEEDED THE SQUALID, STULTIFYING EXPERIENCE OF LIVING SOME OF THEM TWICE! PLUS AN EXTRA FEW MONTHS!!
SO UNTIL MY SPONGE STOPS TRYING TO CANNIBALIZE ITSELF (ETA: NOT FUCKING SOON ENOUGH), DO NOT EXPECT COHERENCY FROM ME
BECAUSE I CANNOT EVEN SORT OUT THE SIMPLE CONCEPT OF "YESTERDAY" FROM THE FESTERING REMAINS OF MY OWN THOUGHT ORGAN.
YESTERDAY MEANS TOO MANY THINGS RIGHT NOW.
YESTERDAY CAN FRANKLY GO FUCK ITSELF TWICE IN A BRAND NEW ORIFICE I'VE JUST INVENTED FOR IT.
ALL I KNOW IS THE LESS I SEE OF POSSESSED PSYCHOPATHS AND THEIR WEAPONIZED CUTLERY, THE BETTER.
SOMEONE TELL ME HOW MUCH TIME HAS PASSED SINCE I DISAPPEARED AND WHO'S HERE, BECAUSE I CANNOT EVEN CARE TO CHECK THE LIST RIGHT NOW.
WHY, IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS, DID THIS ASSHOLE INSTILL INTO LIVING BEINGS THE CONCEPT OF THINGS HAPPENING BEFORE AND AFTER EACH OTHER
AND WHY DO I HAVE TO BE AFFLICTED WITH THIS WHEN I'M NOT EVEN A FUCKING TIME PLAYER.
WAS IT NOT ENOUGH TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE ENDLESS STABLE TIME LOOPS HOLDING THE SHODDY STICKS AND TWINE OF OUR TIMELINE TOGETHER?
WHAT ABOUT THE FLUX OF PEOPLE BACK AND FORTH FROM DIFFERENT SPOTS ALONG THAT LINE LIKE BACKWASH FROM AN ILL-CLEANED MOUTH INTO A SOULMELTING BOTTLE OF FAYGO???
WELL I GUESS THE FUCK NOT, BECAUSE HERE I AM BEING FORCED TO DEAL WITH OVER FIVE YEARS WORTH OF MEMORIES LAID OVER THE TOP OF EACH OTHER LIKE PARADOX SPACE DECIDED TO MAKE A PARTICULARLY AWFUL SANDWICH OUT OF THEM.
SAID SANDWICH HAS THEN BEEN FORCE FED DIRECTLY INTO MY THINK PAN
I AM OVERSTUFFED WITH RECOLLECTION AND REMEMBRANCE
MY BRAIN WOULD VOMIT IF IT WERE PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE. CONTEMPLATE THAT FOR A MINUTE.
OR HOWEVER LONG, I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT THE UNITS, AND NONE OF IT WILL APPROXIMATE THE SCREAMING HEADACHE CURRENTLY DECIMATING MY CRANIAL UNIT.
COULD I NOT HAVE GONE THROUGH THIS IN EASILY DIGESTED PIECES
WOULD THAT BE SO FUCKING HARD TO DO.
SURE, SEND ME BACK A COUPLE HOURS THAT FIRST TIME, BUT NO! YOU SCIENTIST NOOKMONGERS JUST *HAD* TO GIVE ME THE FULL THREE YEARS.
WHO CARES THAT I WAS ALREADY 15 AND A HALF IN EARTH YEARS, I OBVIOUSLY NEEDED THE SQUALID, STULTIFYING EXPERIENCE OF LIVING SOME OF THEM TWICE! PLUS AN EXTRA FEW MONTHS!!
SO UNTIL MY SPONGE STOPS TRYING TO CANNIBALIZE ITSELF (ETA: NOT FUCKING SOON ENOUGH), DO NOT EXPECT COHERENCY FROM ME
BECAUSE I CANNOT EVEN SORT OUT THE SIMPLE CONCEPT OF "YESTERDAY" FROM THE FESTERING REMAINS OF MY OWN THOUGHT ORGAN.
YESTERDAY MEANS TOO MANY THINGS RIGHT NOW.
YESTERDAY CAN FRANKLY GO FUCK ITSELF TWICE IN A BRAND NEW ORIFICE I'VE JUST INVENTED FOR IT.
ALL I KNOW IS THE LESS I SEE OF POSSESSED PSYCHOPATHS AND THEIR WEAPONIZED CUTLERY, THE BETTER.
SOMEONE TELL ME HOW MUCH TIME HAS PASSED SINCE I DISAPPEARED AND WHO'S HERE, BECAUSE I CANNOT EVEN CARE TO CHECK THE LIST RIGHT NOW.
[Text] I'm glad it amused you :3c
YOU'RE DAVE'S BRO??????
[Text]
feel free to commence swooning if you so desire. and i am willing to accept heartfelt apologies.
[Text]
HELL NO
HELL FUCKING NO.
I AM NOT GOING TO SWOON, APOLOGIZE, OR EVEN SWAY ON MY FEET.
MY KNEES ARE MORE SOLID THAN STEEL, MY HEART IS STONE COLD.
STRIDERS MUST ALWAYS FIRST WIN ME OVER, AND YOU ARE ON A FAST TRACK TO DOUCHEVILLE, POPULATION ONE OVERGROWN PUSTULE ON THE ASS OF THE WORLD, HIS UGLY SHADES, AND AN EGO SO HUGE NO ONE ELSE COULD LIVE THERE EVEN IF THEY SUFFERED THE MASSIVE BRAIN DAMAGE REQUIRED TO WANT TO DO SO.
I ALREADY HAVE THE BEST STRIDER AS MY BEST FRIEND, AND I AM NOT INTERESTED IN SWITCHING THAT UP.
[Text]
you seriously think i wanna be your best friend. and here you are accusing my ego of being huge.
go take a shower kid. i fear i might be overwhelmed by the rancid stench of hypocrisy thats coming off you right now.
[Text]
NO, I DON'T HONESTLY THINK YOU WANT TO BE MY BEST FRIEND.
I'M NOT AN IDIOT.
AND IT'S NOT FUCKING DARLING, SO SHUT YOUR METAPHORICAL MOUTH.
[Text]
wow.
i am blown away here. metaphorically.
ps. rank stain is another one for the shitty insult book. im dead serious.
[Text]
AND IF YOU KEEP GOING ON ABOUT YOUR STUPID BOOK OF INSULTS I AM GOING TO HUNT IT DOWN AND SET IT ON FIRE.
[Text]
now listen. im gonna give you a third chance to play it cool. put on your big boy pants okay.
ready?
sup man. welcome back to vatheon. whatever bullshit you went through and described in awful analogies is over now. heres to more shenanigans under the sea.
[Text]
I HAVE BEEN HERE BEFORE, LONGER THAN YOU BY A PRETTY CONSIDERABLE MARGIN
AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO ASK HOW LONG YOU'VE BEEN AROUND, BECAUSE I'VE BEEN AROUND LONGER THAN MOST PEOPLE IN GENERAL.
I KNOW HOW THIS PLACE WORKS, WHAT IT'S LIKE, AND I AM NOT GOING TO "PLAY IT COOL" JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN'T SHUT YOUR STUPIDITY SPHINCTER AND CLAMP DOWN ON THE IDIOCY YOU WANT TO SHIT OUT ACROSS THE CONVERSATION.
I DON'T WANT ANY DAMN UNDERSEA SHENANIGANS RIGHT NOW
I DON'T WANT SHENANIGANS PERIOD.
I HAVE HAD WAY TOO MANY SHENANIGANS OF EVERY KIND IMAGINABLE AND SOME OUTSIDE THE BOUNDS OF SENTIENT CONCEPTION, AND I AM TIRED, AND PISSED OFF, AND HAVE NO MORE PATIENCE FOR YOUR TRITE REPETITIVE BULLSHIT!
GO FUCK YOURSELF, OR SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST, OR JUST GO AWAY SOMEWHERE AND PISS OFF SOMEONE ELSE
I'M DONE.
[Click!!!!!]