caughtinanetwork | video; open

Entry tags:

video; open

... It's waxing crescent again.

[That's what he mutters after a while. The camera's facing what looks to be the horizon over the island and floating not too low in the sky is the moon, just a small, sharp sliver of bright white.

For those who recognize the voice, it's undoubtedly Saix speaking, but there's something different about it all the same. It sounds... almost mesmerized, as if he's not quite all there. That's because whoever's been stuck inside of this body can't quite control it yet and thanks to the moon's power, far away or as different as it is from the one back home, Axel can barely focus his mind and body on anything else.

Originally he had intended for this to be a normal video. He wanted to address the rest of the dome the way he used to when he was in his regular body. Maybe if he tossed out a joke or two he would feels better... but he finds that he can't. Not like this.

Something tugs at his chest and off to the side Axel brings a hand to his face, covering his eyes. He doesn't like this... feeling so out of power. After a moment, he speaks up again, his voice slightly grating.]

Someone tell me... How do you know if you have a heart?

And is it worth all the trouble it gives?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How do you expect me to focus when I just feel like something's trying to hold me back?

[There's a slight pause.]

I count stars.

Stars...

Doesn't that get tiring after a while?

No. Not for me.

Seems like it would take a long time.

But I guess there's no sense in not trying. This body doesn't exactly want to move right now.

That's the point. If I focus on the stars, sometimes it helps make the moon more of a background event, still affecting me but not as strongly. It helps in other events too.

Other events?

Yes. I had to do it in my head, of course, but it helped.

... I'd laugh right now if I could.

Not so pleasant, is it?

... It's actually kind of nice.

I'm going to assume you're talking about the moon.

I always thought the moon was nice.

I'm more talking about... not being able to laugh. I can't really explain it well.

Thinking is different than connecting.

...Are you certain the curse just switched our bodies and didn't have a more adverse effect on you?

Fine; it feels nice too.

I don't know. I guess it's kind of like less of a burden.

[Though now he feels like there's something else in place of that. He just wishes he knew what.]

I suppose. It doesn't feel that way to me.

It's nice. I forgot how it felt.

I guess I should say enjoy it while you can, then.

[Another, longer pause.]

It's not fair. Both of us worked hard and together for ten years, so why is it just you who can actually feel things again?

I might know the reason.

What?

[He waits a while, then,]

Roxas.

What does he have to do with anything?

I think I started to feel differently the more we spent time together.

How would he be able to do something like that? We always knew he was unique for a Nobody but that seems ridiculous.

I couldn't explain it then and I don't think I can understand it any better now.

But something about Roxas helped me feel more human.

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